Whatsthe difference between a pile of dead babies and a chicken? Chickens don't make me laugh.

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What do you call a computer running Windows DOS? Obselete

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What do you can a boy with no arms and no legs? Names!

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Who in Tyrone's black family gave him presents on christmas? Not his dad.

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What do you call an Interlochen Arts Academy Student with no talent? A comparative artist

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Why is Bruce Wayne named Batman and Tim Drake named Robin? They wanted to hunt bats and robins whenever someone does something bad.

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What did the coney say to the hotdog? At least i kill people.

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Knock knock. "Who's there?" "It's Mr. Johnson, your next door neighbor." "Come on in."

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If you are what you eat, then imagine a prostitute.

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Why did the hipster burn his tongue? The tea he was drinking was at an unsuitable temperature for consumption resulting in the scalding of his mouth.

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Your mom is so fat shes having trouble getting into her own pants.

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Knock knock. who's there? your dead cat, here you go.

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Lad: Whats that smell Girl: Nothing Lad: That is right nothing now get into the kitchen!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Most likely for no discernible reason as chickens are animals with poor reasoning skills.

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Jesus: I will return. Hitler: Well I am back... Nazi as in Nazireth Bush: As I said I was elected by Gawd. Me: What? What about me? Seriously why did I put myself here? Id have three bullets with them in a room, and id still shoot you six times.

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A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism. "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "I already asked ''Banana who?'' Is that your real name? Who is this really?" "Knock Knock." "You are upsetting me. I am calling the police now. Please get off my property."

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What did the straw say to the other straw? We are both straws just kidding they cant talk

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Why did the black guy cross the road? Because he was late for a meeting

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Q. Why didn't the man tell his girlfriend about his big lottery win? A. Because it was none of her business.

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Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

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one day a boy asked a Manican if it had a pulse it didn't

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Whats worse than getting shot in the foot? Watching each member of your family get shot in the foot.

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what's worse, ten babies stapled to a tree or one baby stapled to ten trees?

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There once was a man from Dundee, Whose Limericks ended on line three. I don't know why.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops