-What do you say to a woman with Two Black eyes?. -Are you really that dumb to leave the kitchen twice -Elder High School

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was commiting suicide.

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knock knock who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's alzheimers has progressed to the point where she no longer remembers him.

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*puts thumbs up on own anti-joke. Nobody needs to know....

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall. Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. His death was mourned by his wife and three children who wished he would not have been so reckless.

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what do you call a blonde who can't drive? a poor driver

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"Would you like to see our stool samples?" asked the salesman. 10 minutes later, I left with 3 new bar stools.

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What is the best part about having sex with tweny-six year olds. There are twenty of them. ap~pac

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A person who doesn't know hungarian is trying to read the next sentence. Sajnos nem érti, mivel nem tud magyarul.

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Whats green and has wings? grass, I lied about the wings.

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Why did the sailor fall off the boat? Because vampires arent real.

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Your momma's so stupid that she was declared mentally retarded by her doctors.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme But this one doesnt

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck.

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How many licks does it take to get to center of a tootsie pop? pickles, 7:00 pm, wood, shoulder pain

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A Cheerio is at Cheerio high school, and there is another Cheerio that he wants to ask to the prom, but she is a frosted Cheerio and because of Cheerio social statuses she would not go with him. So he goes to the Cheerio factory so he can become a frosted Cheerio. The factory workers tell him that he can be a frosted Cheerio, but the machines are malfunctioning today and they can only frost half of him. He agrees, and the girl Cheerio goes to the prom with him. He shows up at the prom with her, and she asks him to get her some punch. So, he's walking around, looking for the punch line, when he realizes: There isn't any.

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Whats worst than getting raped by an old man? -Nothing, getting raped is probably the worst thing to happen to you.

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Why did the old man die? He died because he saw the light wich happened to be a street light in the distance.

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What is the difference between a fridge and a tree ? The fridge can't sing

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Why did the black guy smell fried chicken? He had a brain tumour

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A: When was rhe last time you touched yourself? B: A few seconds ago when I had an itch on my arm

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How old is your mom Dead

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Q: Why do Asian children tend to be smarter than other children A: They have longer school years

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what did pedobear say to the 60 year old man nothing he was too busy molesting the girl across the street

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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