What's green and fuzzy, has 4 legs, and if it falls from a tree it'll kill you? A pool table.

haiku's are funny. but sometimes they don't make sense. refrigerator.

Have you seen that ad about starving children in Africa? It was pretty gay

Nero, seriously, one way or the other, ill kill you, my mom blushes like every time people talk to her so fuck you, my sister if you touch her, ill.... Man, stop and ill forgive you, and I am very very sorry, now stop sending me those pics, and please do not post them anywhere, Line would not want to.

i am not a pothead!!! the only time ive evr been high was springbreak last year!!! mm hmm... wat were u doin over spring break to get high? i had jaw surgery and the doctor had me on tons of painkillers

A Russian drinking something other than vodka.

What did the polar bear say to the penguin? What are you doing here?

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have alzheimer's, cheese on toast

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have said two factual statements.

What do you call a hindu that has radiation poisoned A radiatative hindu

What did the man dying of cancer want for his birthday? To live.

Yo mamma is so fat, that she's going on a diet and is exercising regularly to lose wait.

How do you tell identical twins apart? You can't. They look identical.

How do you eat a candy cane? Shove it in your mouth and chew.

- Knock, knock. - Who's there? - Immigration.

What did the man who brutally raped and murdered his infant daughter say? He didn't.

A blonde a brunette and a ginger jump off a cliff they die upon impact and their families mourn for years to come.

Michael J Fox may not be able to draw a perfect circle but he sure can jerk off like a champ

How do you stop a plane? Land it.

Don't tell anyone, the Health Department is already on our backs.

A chemist and his buddy walk into a bar. The chemist, trying to sound smart, says, "I would like a glass of H20." The buddy, being a normal person who actually cares if he looks like an idiot, asks for plain water.

Who gave Miley Cyrus her new haircut? Hellen Keller

What did the little girl with no legs or arms get for Christmas? Cancer. Knock knock? Who's there? Not that little girl.

What do you do when your condom breaks during sexual intercourse? Get AIDS.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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