How do you fit an elephant into a car? You can't. Unless it's a baby elephant. You would probably also need a convertible with the top down.

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What's slow and spotted? A cheetah, I lied about the slow part

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What did a blonde and a Puerto Rican name their baby? Joshua, after the blonde's grandfather who passed away a year earlier.

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A train conducter conducts goes at 60mph, when he goes under a bridge he goes at 52mph. When he goes over a hill he goes at 47mph. If he goes under 3 bridges and over 6 hills what did the conductors mother eat for dinner that night. Nothing, after many months of suffering she died from Huntington's disease.

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A man walks into a bar with a monkey..I forget the rest but your mother is a whore.

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What's the difference between a trampoline and a dead baby? I take my cleats off when I jump on the trampoline

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haiku's are funny. but sometimes they don't make sense. refrigerator.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it was diagnosed with cancer and didn't want to live any more

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so a man goes to jurrasic park and sees two dinosaurs fighting. he shits himself.

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Tic tac toe Your mother and I are getting a divorce.

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Whats white and black and red all over? A panda that has just been shot by a poacher.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? Another successful moon landing by NASA in which the African-American astronaut went on a successful moon walk.

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Why was the kid dizzy? He ran in a circle repeatedly.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar

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what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit on the way there.

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my girlfriend had a weird fetish, she used to dress up like herself and act like a bitch all the time.

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Roses are red, violets are blue.. Oh i can't finish joke coz i gotta go poo ! :/

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Good because it is important to keep food chilled to prevent it from spoiling and in turn wasting money

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Q:what did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? other person: What? A:how am i suppose to know I'm not a lawyer.

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What is blue and has clouds in it? The sky.

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Q: what did the white man say to the black man? A: hi

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Do you like fishsticks? Yes I personally think they are high in saturated fats, but to each his own Oh I thought you were asking if I was homosexual

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Why'd the aborted fetus cross the road? 9/11

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops