Why did the young Mexican apply for a job at McDonalds? The economy is down and his family could use the extra money.

-how many potatoes are in a sack -5

knock knock who's there? the police, we have a warrant for your arrest.

What did the walrus say to the Penguin. It said MAHHRGH. because walruses can't really talk

What is small, slimy, and thrown in the garbage? A stillborn

The cow's name was Friday, But can you guess what day it died? Monday, it had a fun weekend with its family before it was brutally slaughtered.

What happened to the man who poo'd too much? He started to eat less because his bowell movements started to cause him serious pain.

Boys have swag, real men have class

Whats a Quires favorite type of sport?--- A contact sport

A man invites his Irish friend to his house. "Would you like something to drink?" the man asks. "Just kidding, we don't have any drinks." Later, they die of dehydration.

Whats brown and sticky? Brown paint,

What's the only think duct tape can't fix? Your parents divorce.

Why did the cookie go to the hospital? It had cancer.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Nothing, he found his tractor and went back to work.

My grandmother's zodiac sign was cancer, and she was killed by a giant crab.

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall, He cracked his skull and died on impact. He will be missed.

What happened to the orphan? Who cares?

After pursuing a speeding vehicle for 10km at speeds ranging from 120 - 160km/h, the police officer managed to stop the driver. The driver of the vehicle rolled down the window and asked, "What seems to be the problem officer?" to which the police officer replied, "It sounds like one of your cylinders is firing incorrectly, you have a fairly large amount of carbon build-up on and around your exhaust pipe."

So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. He crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

Knock knock! Who's there? Your mother. Oh, hi Mom! Come in!

What do you call a fat kid? I don't know...you tell me

My Nan, that is all.

Roses are red Violets are blue I can't rhyme The end

poop

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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