What did the kid say to Santa? Nothing, he was a goat.

Patient: Doctor Doctor I think I have HIV! Doctor: Wtf to that one...

Why did the n i g g e r steal money? because he was black! and wanted a KFC thanksgiving! :)

What do Helen Keller, Stevie Wonder, and Ray Charles have in common? They were all mentioned in the previous sentence.

Knock knock... Whose there? Patrick Oh hey, come in...

To mamma so fat..............nuff said

What's worse than finding an apple in your worm... I mean, a worm in your apple ? "Then I took an arrow to the knee" jokes.

A man died and went to heaven. Luckily, he was resuscitated by a trained medical professional, and after a stern warning from his doctor, he lost weight, limited the cholesterol in his diet, and went on to live a very happy and healthy life.

What's a group of people that has an N, an I, two Gs, an E and an R that have no souls? Gingers.

Why didn't Anne Frank answer the door? Because it was the German SS.

Okay, but cut me some slack here, its not as straight forward as it sounds, I got at least twice as many active synapses as other people do, that means twice the thought process, in video games I can for example remember twice the commands, and such. Sadly this does not mean that I can think twice as fast or twice as smart, but rather that I do so involuntarily in short spans, until I burn myself out. So be a bit nice to me, when I say that I have since I was a kid used about 2.5-7.5 mg valium, this is just because my thought process works so fast I burn out because well, I got the processor, but it burns out, excuse me my wife needs some help with her cellphone, see you soon

Roses are Red Violets are Blue No they're not They're purple

How do you stop your child from picking his nose? Cut his hands off

What was wrong with the man watching a black and white television program? He wasn't watching a black and white television program at all-he actually had color blindness.

Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she is legally blind

You wanna hear a joke? People that debase womens' rights.

What do you call 10 Asians playing basketball? A group of friends hanging out and having a good time.

Peg leg Pete, yay, I know stuff too, I watched that one all the time when I was a girl.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders house?. No, Well neither has he...

A young farmers cow died in an oil burning, The farmer then said to his son; you get the milk ill get the shovel

Yo mamma is so fat She has to wear big pants and is easily fatigued.

How do you confuse a blonde? Put her in a circle and tell her to sit in the corner.

What's red, hairy, and squishy? Helen Keller in a blender.

What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...