One day a man discovered he could suck his own penis. Unfortunately he was heterosexual and could derive no pleasure from doing so as he was acutely aware of the fact he had a penis in his mouth.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, these two statement are obvious unless you are color blind

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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What did Washington say to California? WC

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Q. What is worse than being raped A. Being raped twice

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Roses are red My balls are blue Get off Unless You want too

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Democracy.

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you were so loud you woke helen keller up!!!!!!!

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am epileptic. SLAWWAWASWAKHINGAGAGAGAKIHARGAVBAZSAWAWAWAWAAAAA

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What the person say to the other Person? Hi.

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Roses Are Blue I Have A Gun And Ill Sout You!

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What did the shy guy say at the speech? Nothing

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There were two blondes going to California for the summer, they are about two hours into the flight and the pilot gets on the intercom and says we just lost an engine but it is all right we have three more but it will take us an hour longer. A half hour later he gets on the intercom again and says we just lost another engine but its all right we have two more it will take us another half hour though. One of the blondes says "If we lose the two last engines we will be up here all day"

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Is it a bird, is it a plane?! No it's.... It's a bird.

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How can you treble the value of any Skoda car? Ensure its paintwork, upholstary, floor, lights, wipers, steering wheel, brake, horn, CD player, radio and clutch are clean and/or sound; fill its petrol tank, oil, brake and winscreen wiper fluid reserves; fit a roof rack; include a red triangle, a fire extinguisher, a blanket and a first aid kit in the sale; take out comprehensive insurance and pay a year's road tax and MOT before selling it.

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How many Jews can you fit in a one-person car? --One in the drivers seat, 30 million in the ashtray

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What do you get when two chickens cross a road? -Salmonella stricken hobos

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Q: When you have alot of hair, what are you? A: Obease

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How do you make an idiot in suspense?

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what is brown and wet? Muddy water

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What's the worst part about anti jokes? They get boring after a while

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A clueless chicken walks into a bar. Now being cooked on the BBQ.

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why did mad is on home s walk becuaes a isnt a number

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I gotta friend named Michael Nugyen and he dishonored his family. Did I mention he was asian ( he live in tampa fl )

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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