How do you fit 76 babies in a bath tub... With a blender. How do you get them back out? With tortilla chips.

Why did the Hispanic woman cheat on her husband? Because he couldn't maintain an erection, was boring, and collected stamps.

What do you call Justin Bieber's assassin? A hero doing a noble favor to the community.

What's 1 + 1? Fish. What's 2+2? Window. pie.

why did the platypus fall out of a tree it couldnt even climb up the tree

What do you call a boy with no arms or legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

what do you call a sexy feminist? nothing, there are none

Why was the tree sad? Because a bird shat on it.

What did the cow say to the other cow when the boy asked him for something to drink? Probably MOOO! Considering that cows cant say anything except for that

why did the cow say "moo"? because he's a cow and that's what cows say.

A momma tomato and a baby tomato are walking down the street, and the baby tomato starts to fall behind. The mother turns to it and says "hurry up."

im @ work, LOL.

Why did the pelican cross the road? The man did not reply because his mother recently died in a car accident while crossing the road. She also loved pelicans.

Why did the Europeans colonise Africa Because they couldn't do it themselves

I've got a fever, and the only prescription is more ibuprofen...

Man 1: is that boy high? Man 2: No. He has down syndrome

A chicken walks into a bar and orders a beer. He's not really a chicken, he's just called a chicken because he is always afraid.

Q. How many dead babies can you fit into a bathtub? A. That obviously depends on the size of the bathtub and each individual infant.

I went to a restaurant, but after I ate the food felt sick, then I remembered that I ordered penis with cum Popsicles so I knew it couldn't be the food

Why did the rooster die. Because I killed it.

how many black guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?................ we dont know because u cant c them

people magazine

A doctor walks into a bar. It's his day off and decides to celebrate after a long week of working.

Why was the youtube like bar green? Because the graphics designer felt like making it green. =.=

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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