Q: What did Mr. Spoke say when Captain Kirk was raping him? A: "Ouch! Ouch! Captain, this is so illogical!"

why did the chicken cross the street i dont know thats why im asking you

How do you get a clown off of a swing? You throw an axe at its face.

good morning. good day. good night. good to see you santa

How many lawyers does it take to screw in a lightbulb One because lawyers are usually well educated and know how to screw in a lightbulb

What did the twin towers order from the pizzeria? Two large Plane

your brother so fine that hes skinney

Q. What is worse than a worm in your apple? A. Hitler

Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme But this one doesnt

Why did the man laugh as he sat in the electric chair? He was being tickled by the guard.

George Bush=Bush Dick Cheny=Dick Colin Powell=Colon Condoleezza Rice=Rice One of these doesn't belong here.

Why was the boy embarrassed when he opened his parents' bedroom door? Because he had been trying the door for several minutes until he realized he was pushing instead of pulling.

A man wakes up after a long night with a girl he recently met. He pulls out a cigarette, and looks for his lighter, but can not find it. He asks the girl if she has a lighter and she replies "There might be some matches in the top drawer of my dresser." He opens the top drawer and finds some matches.

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a serial killer.

sweating like antoni with a girl

Q: Why did the man die of starvation??? A: He didn't eat for 3 days!!

Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

why does pink turn into blue it doesnt you just get hit by a frigde because you cried whe you got shot several times

Q. why did the boy who just had his first kiss feel no emotion? A. He got hit a Croquet mallet and died

Why did the boy fall off his bike? He was shot in the head. Plus the fact that it was his first attempt on a bike made it highly unlikely to succeed anyway.

What's black and white and red all over? A black, white, and red shirt.

There was a mexican man and a chinese man, They walked into a bomb shop and bought three bombs, then left.

hey i just met you, and this is crazy, i have alzheimers, hey i just met you

How does an elephant climb a cliff who cares

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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