A duck walks into a bar. The duck walks over to the bartender and orders a beer. "put it on my bill." he says. The bartender angrily grabs the duck and kicks him out of the bar, because the duck has done this many times, but has never once paid his bill to the bar. The duck is an alcoholic and is slowly ruining his relationship with his family.

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Crime doesn't pay. Sure it does

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What would happen if RAINN Wilson, the actor, married Michael MANN, the director? They'd probably be arrested; 2 men can't get married in California anymore (thanks a lot, Utah)!

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What's 6 inches long, 2 inches wide, and drives women crazy. A 6 inch long 2 inch diameter syringe filled with heroin being injected into a woman.

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zx

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Why do nascar drivers wreck Jeff gordon's bad racing Stupidity And kyle buschs great wrecking ability

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Paki? Nothing, they're both as bad as each other.

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Why was the girl on the ground? She jumped off a bridge.

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What do you call a 2 storied house ? A dolphin! :D

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What kind of people have fat lips? People who have gotten punched in the lip or have suffered a serious lip injury that has caused their lips to swell up.

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What's big, moves around everywhere, and has four wheels? four TEENS on four wheelers

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Roses are red Violets are too I am color blind How about you

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What did the raped girl say to the doctor? Nothing she was dead on arrival.

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what did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, They just waved.

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Is your Alzheimers getting better? I have alzeimers?...

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How do you stop a canadian from saying eh? Kill it...

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whats worse than speaking with your mouth full? pooing with your mouth full

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whats brown and smells like poop? poop.

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What happens to a banana after it gets sunburnt? It peels.

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Your momma's so dumb she graduated high school with a C average.

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What happened to the alcoholic? He got liver cancer

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whats worse than nailing 8 babies to 8 trees? nailing 1 baby to 8 trees.

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Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I have Alzheimer's Hey i just met you

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Knock Knock!! . . (There is no response as nobody's home)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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