a kid walks into a room and confesses to his mother he is gay the mother then repeatedly beats him until he is bleeding out of both ears then leaves him there to think about what he just said.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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Why did you loose the basketball game? Because they scored more points than us.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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Yo mums so fat she went on a diet.

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How did the fat guy servive the plane crash??????? He bounced

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roses are red, violets are blue, niggers are black and so is my poo

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I agree Nero, we agree there, but let me ask you, why did you have the deep desire to create such a society before? You managed to do so as a teen, you wanted to help others, you put them before yourself, you where far more loyal to them, than they ever where to you. What motivated you then to sacrifice so much, where is that strength today?

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life is like a box of chocolates... it doesnt last long for fat peopl

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a sabertooth walks into a club. the caveman set his trap perfectly.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are in a terrible ship crash that leaves them stranded on a desert island. All of their survival supplies sank with the boat so they don't last very long.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven

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Your mother is so fat that if she were to fall from a great height she would hit the ground with more force than that of an average sized individual.

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david give me my money back... i will have it next week

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How do you get your lawyer to shut up. Hit him with a bat.

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A dyslexic woman wears a bar.

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whats the difference between a baby and a puppy? i care when the puppy dies....

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What did the mentaly handycap kid get for christmas. A Bop-It

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How many black people does it take to tar a roof? Just one. Unless he wants to do it in a shorter amount of time and calls a few friends to help him.

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Two stoners walk into a bar. They didn't drive there because they were high and wanted to enjoy a cool, evening stroll.

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Your mumma is so fat, she has diabetes.

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What did Jimmy do on his 8th birthday? Turn 8.

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What can fit between breasts? Is long? And gets hard when you jerk it? A seatbelt.

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So Helen Keller walks into a bar...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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