Your moms so fat She should get some help because there's nothing good about being fat

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What did the blind man say when you asked hi his favorite color? Nothing he is death too

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What happened to timmy? He had downsyndrome and walked off a cliff

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A panda walks into a bar and orders a beer and a hamburger. After he eats he stands up stretches and pulls out a gun shooting everyone in the room but the bartender. The panda puts $20 on the bar and turns to leave. As he walks out the door the bartender asks why the panda shot everyone. The panda tells him to look in the encyclopedia. The bartender looks up panda and he reads: "A rare bearlike mammal (Ailuropoda melanoleuca) of the mountains of China and Tibet, having woolly fur with distinctive black and white markings. Also called giant panda, panda bear." Seeing absolutely nothing in this description that would rationalize the homicides the panda had just committed, the bartender arrived at the reasonable conclusion that the panda was psychotic and having severe psychological problems which probably caused the incident. The bartender couldn't help but wonder if this tragedy could've been avoided had the panda been properly screened for schizophrenia and guns been properly secured in a safe at the panda's mother's house.

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Q: What did the poor man do when he saw a Ferrari? A: He realized that he would really enjoy having the money to buy such a nice vehicle, so he decided to take it upon himself to enroll in night classes. After many years of hard work, he earned a degree and a high-paying position at a large software corporation, and bought his dream car. He often told the story to his children as an example of what hard work and a goal in mind could achieve you. He lived a long, productive life and died fulfilled.

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why did the Mexican make a burrito for his grandma? it's her favorite food and she has artheritis and its to painful for her to stand long enough to make one herself.

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Why was the black man killed? He committed a serious crime and was issued the death penalty.

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How many Bedouins do you need to change a light bulb? 2, one is changing the bulb and the second is powering the generator.

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why did the black person cross the road to get to his lynched sister

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A jewish man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder, the bartender asks "where'd you get that" the man replied "at a pet shop"

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A man walked into a bar, therefore beginning a lifetime of alcoholism that would slowly tear his family apart.

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Your text.

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What do you call 4 Mexicans getting into a car late at night? 3rd Shift carpooling

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A jew walks in the german bar, the jew is captured tortured, raped, and shot along with his entire family

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? Someone left the gate open.

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I once had my heart broken by my first true love. I then died, she was convicted of murder and my family grieved over my death.

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Rebecca Blacks walk into a bar. She gets shot.

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What's black and white and enforces the rules at football games? A referee? Wow you're really smart.

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Two dogs went out for a walk. Then their master took them home.

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What smells like dead rats? Dead hamsters

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What happened to the lion which escaped from the zoo? It was successfully recaptured.

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What's worse then getting socks on Christmas? Being murdered by a bear.

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What has 4 legs and doesn't move? A child born in Chernobyl.

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Why couldn't the boy hide his penis? Circumcision.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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