What is long hard and woody? A tree.

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Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? No. Neither have they.

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"Tell me a joke" Tom says Your life.

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What did the homless man get for Christmas? Nothing

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So a man walks into a bar and wonders why he walked into the building instead of simply just walking through the door. The man then realized that the building was if fact not a local bar, but instead a bowling alley. He was hallucinogenic and was in serious danger as he approached the candy man in the alley.

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a plane crashes on the boarder of america and mexico where do you bury the survivors. you dont bury the surviors

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Subject A: Knock Knock! Subject B: *silence* Subsequently, Subject A dejectedly walks home and hangs himself.

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You're tall.

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Benny: Hi, my name is Benny, what's your name? A potato: ...

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What's up? The sky. What's down? Your mom: she was stabbed

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I road a horse to school. My friend stabbed it with a Javelin and screamed.... The horse was his Dad

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Roses are red violets are blue, your library book is overdue, and if you dont pay the fine...i'll punch you in the mouth.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the KFC man was chasing him.

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why did the Mexican make a burrito for his grandma? it's her favorite food and she has artheritis and its to painful for her to stand long enough to make one herself.

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How are a black man, a hispanic man, and a chinese man similar? Believe it or not they all love cantaloupe!

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Why did the bear eat the asian? It was hungry

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"...."-Hellen Keller

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josh is a skinny headed keppy mong

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A panda walks into a bar and orders a beer and a hamburger. After he eats he stands up stretches and pulls out a gun shooting everyone in the room but the bartender. The panda puts $20 on the bar and turns to leave. As he walks out the door the bartender asks why the panda shot everyone. The panda tells him to look in the encyclopedia. The bartender looks up panda and he reads: "A rare bearlike mammal (Ailuropoda melanoleuca) of the mountains of China and Tibet, having woolly fur with distinctive black and white markings. Also called giant panda, panda bear." Seeing absolutely nothing in this description that would rationalize the homicides the panda had just committed, the bartender arrived at the reasonable conclusion that the panda was psychotic and having severe psychological problems which probably caused the incident. The bartender couldn't help but wonder if this tragedy could've been avoided had the panda been properly screened for schizophrenia and guns been properly secured in a safe at the panda's mother's house.

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Why was the black man killed? He committed a serious crime and was issued the death penalty.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Interrupting Pessimist. Interrupting Pessi- Slavery.

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Why did the child with one arm shave his head? He is a swimmer.

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What happened to timmy? He had downsyndrome and walked off a cliff

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What did the blind man say when you asked hi his favorite color? Nothing he is death too

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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