Q: What happened to Sally, did she get that cough checked out? A: She died while driving there and got in a 12 car pileup.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What's green and fuzzy and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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Where did Lucy go went the bomb went off? Everywhere

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How do you make a little boy cry? Slap the cookie out of his hand.

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what do you call a gay ginger boy ? Ronan.

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Guess what? Bananas

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Roses are red. I f***** a dude. you're a failed abortion. I never loved you.

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Japan

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A French man gets into a fight

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Q: What's worse than falling off a mountain A: Falling off a mountain into a pile of spikes

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Why did the car cross the road? Isn't that what cars do?

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"knock knock" "who's there" "I dont know, check the door"

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Replacement Referees

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A blonde, a brunette and a red-head find a mirror with a message on it that says "Stand in front of the mirror and say something you think is true. If it is true, I'll grant you a wish. If it is wrong, you'll be sucked inside the mirror and be trapped there forever." The blonde, who is standing in front of the mirror, says "I think this is a stupid joke." and nothing happened.

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Matthew Baker

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What do you call a really bad band? Nickelback.

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Three women are seen walking while having ice cream. One of them is licking the ice cream. Another is sucking the ice cream, and the other one is biting the ice cream. One of these women is married. Which one is married? The one that has a wedding ring on her finger.

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Why aren't there Olympics in Mexico? Idk Because everyone that can run jump or swim are already across the boarder.

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whats black and doesnt work? a broken black toaster

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what's better than winning the special olympics? -not being retarded

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Your mom is so fat, I do not see how she can possibly wipe effectively.

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A Matthew walks into a room. Everyone left. This is not a joke

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A goose walks into a bar. Maybe he should have ducked.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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