How long does it take for britney spears to change a light bulb? Fish can not leave the water without dieing.

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What do you call Batman with a knife in his chest? Dead

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I can't remember the punchline for this joke so I recommend you stop reading this...why are you still reading this whats wrong with you!!!!

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Women's rights

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Why do giraffes have long necks? To connect their bodies to their heads.

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how do you kill a bird? tie it to a tree throw a wasp nest at it and run the tree over with a semi filled with manure

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was blind.

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Two women were sitting quietly.

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Keanu Reaves

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Someone threw a fridge at her

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar and the bartender says, " OH MY GOD! YOU CAN WALK?!?!"

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knock knock Who's there Rick Rick who Your wife's boss she got into an on the job accident and will never walk again... I'm sorry but your insurance doesn't cover the injury.

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Why are blondes so dumb? They aren't dumb they just have prejudice against them

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Why Cant michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he is dying of Parkinson's disease.

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Why did the cook put rubber bands in the spaghetti Because he was an asshole

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What do you call an attractive woman in a blender? A very rare occurrence.

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What do a turtle and an eagle have in common? They can both fly. Except for the turtle.

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Guess whats in my hand. Can you guess? A gun. Bam bam, you're dead. Haha

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a group of jews went to a factory to apply for jobs. Only one came out.

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What does the lifeguard do on his free time? Ejaculate.

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Your momas so fat her doctor put her on a diet plan.

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Why was Harry arrested? Because he stabbed multiple children.

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WWII veteran screamed! "You d@mn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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