What did the raped girl get for Christmas? Pregnant.

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Why did the girl blush when she opened the fridge? Because she saw the salad dressing

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Mommy, why did daddy leave? Because you touch yourself at night sweetie.

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A dog walks into a bar, followed by his blind owner.

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So God answered a paralyzed boy's prayer the other day...He said 'No'

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What do you call someone that blows up a plane? Nothing you were on that plane

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Roses are Red, Blues are Violets, Have I Dyslexia, F**k.

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A man walks in to a bar, wakes up the next morning with the news that they have found a cancerous tumor in his neck.

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A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

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What's black and blue and hates sex? The ten year old in my trunk

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Q: what white hard and huge and it can kill you if you fall out of a tree? A: a refrigerator

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Row, row, row your... Canoe.

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How many Druggies does it take to make toast. One.

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A man walks into a coffee shop and buys a bookshelf.

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What do you call literature that's depressing and hard to read? ...a valued part of the English curriculum

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Whats worse tan finding a worm in your apple? Being touched by Michael Jackson

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Two cows in a field one says Moo the other says, Moo

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How do you say the weekend in French? The weekend in French.

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Where did the guy who shot his neighbor go? Jail, because he was caught, sent to court, and was convicted of murder.

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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Did you hear about the kid from Texas? He shot his campus up.

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What's worse than a bee sting? A large number of things ranging from getting stung by two bees to falling off a cliff.

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So I went to an audition, my friend said "break a leg" And then I did

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Whats a dogs favorite thing to eat? Food.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops