How many pieces of toast can you eat in 1 year? well, it depends on how many pieces you eat in one day, does it count snacks, or full meals of just toast, can you eat even when your not hungary, if you throw up does it still count? If it is 1 piece a day, it would be 365.

What do you call a man with an Eye patch and no arms? Names.

Roses are red violets are red bushes are red oh shit my garden is on fire

the love boat

A man is sleeping and is woken up. What does he say? Why did you wake me up

What happened to the jew that donated? Stop thinking, jews dont donate.

'l give you a nickle to tickle my pickle i'l give you a dime to take you time

What do Richard and Judy have in common? Nothing.

Why didn't the blond cry at her child's funeral? She died, too. It was a terrible accident.

What's young and not funny? Todays anti-joke writers.

A old man walks into a hospital He doesn't come back out

Sometimes I stare at a Frisbee and wonder why it is getting bigger. Then, it hits me.

Doctor Doctor i've got wind can you give me something? Thats not wind the doctor replies thats a rare form of stomach cancer.

What animal has four legs and one hand? Happy rottweiler

Wanna know a secret? I didn't read or agree to the terms and services

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

roses are red, violets are blue, ive no money for presents, happy christmas everybody

Knock knock Who's there? Fuk Fuk who?

Chuck Norris walks into a bar, and asks for directions to the nearest Applebee's.

(402)217-6102 that is Jesse

Why do Jews have such large noses? Hereditary genetics.

what did jake say to the priest? hmmm, salty

Person 1 Hey man what's up Person 2 nothing much I just impregnated your mom

Knock knock, Who's there? The police, you have committed 14 major felonies and you are being arrested.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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