Eeny meeny miny moe, Catch a piglet by its toe, If it squeals let it go, Or you'll be arrested for animal abuse and receive a heavy fine.

Why was timmy having trouble with his homework? Because lobotomies were a forced practice in the 1950's.

When he was a little boy, what was Chaz Bono's favorite Cher song? Chaz Bono was never a little boy, he was a girl.

a black guy walks into a black bar

Q: Who was shot 50 years ago? A: Abraham Lincoln was shot 50 years ago! (=

What did the cannibal order at McDonalds? Big Mac, extra pickle, hold the mayo.

There once was a man from Duluth who's never did rhyme. They were often too short.

What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing. The ocean is inanimate and therefore incapable of speech.

Pooring urine into your eyes, is a natural way to cure pink eye. Found this out this morning.

How the hell do you know? What are you Nero? You are completely right! I was going to say I got no blue tie, but then I forgot you often call ribbons for ties... How? Should I be scared? I am not, no wonder you never felt human... I am shocked, I cant think straight I am confused and... Sorry Nero, Goodnight, if nothing else, you are no demon, but rather an angel, sweet dreams love. The solvemedia says the bible, this is freaky, my mind is numb.

A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

What did the girl say when she got her period? Nothing, why would she want anyone to know?

knock,knock whos there? teddybear. teddybear who? a teddybear killed your family.

What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper... used to clean up a crime scene.

-What did the policeman say to the boy? -Hello.

What did bob get his wife for christmas? Pregnant

What's the answer to all your problems The answer

Why did the chicken cross the road? To mutilate the body of a Jewish girl that lay on the other side.

what do you do with a drunken sailor? take him back to port because he's not in a right state of mind to be on board a moving vessel

What's funnier than 24? NOTHING!!!

What was the motto of the Holocaust? Yolo.

ew. I wouldn't sleep with you if you were the last man on earth! ...that's what she said!

Johns mother asked him were he had been. John simply replied the shop.

what is long on joe? Not his dick thats for sure.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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