How do you get a bunch of Jews in a car? You tell this family who happens to be of Jewish faith that they are going to be late for the birth of another family member's child. How do you get them out? Tell the mother had a miscarriage. This will make them promptly want to leave the care and grieve with the other family members for the lost child.

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Your mommas so dumb she had to climb a glass wall to see what was on the other side! But the glass was slippy so she never saw what was on the other side.

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whitney housten was supposed to sing at my funeral... but i dont think thats gonna happen. ;(

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A gay man walks into McDonald's. McDonald's serves people of all sexualities.

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Knock Knock Who's There? The I.R.S.

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Why did the squirrel fall out the tree? It was dead Why did the second squirrel fall out the tree? It was stapled to the first squirrel Why did the the third squirrel fall out the tree? Peer pressure Why did the fourth squirrel fall out the tree? It thought it was a game Why did the tree fall over? It thought it was a squirrel Why did the postman die? He got hit in the head by four squirrels and a tree

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Why was the little girl crying? There was a frog stapled to her forehead.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? That would depend on the individual situation at hand and to assume you could accurately estimate that is ridiculous.

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Knock Knock ************************** No-one's home

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Knock Knock Who's there A girl scout want to buy some cookies to raise money for my cardiac surgery?

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What's the worst part of being raped by a unicorn? Being sentenced to a life of shame and humiliation.

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Roses are red, my name is not Dave, this poem makes no sense, microwave.

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Why did the woman buy peanut butter and a puppy? Her husband just died. She was trying to fill the void in her soul with junk food and companionship.

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i tell you whats funny......... what? a fat sudanese man

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a. why? b. because

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whats funny? this joke. just kidding. your face.

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I have aids

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roses are red violets are blue I forogt what I was doing where am I?

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How do you make transportation in Harlem easier? Fix the roads and put in more stoplights.

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What is covered in red and has two legs? Half a cat.

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Why was the kid hungry? Because he lived in Africa.

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What's worse than the haulocost? Not much.

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how did the doctors try to cure stephen hawking? turn him off then back on again

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how may i help you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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