Q-what did the bus say to the other bus? A-nothing, buses are incapable of talking

Eating food: Ugh disgusting! Taking a dump later: THIS IS DELICIOUS! Man, you are doing it wrong... Waterworld was a pretty dry movie, I mean when are they gonna start making movies with a bit of wet humor for a change? SERIOUSLY BELIEVE ME WHEN I SAY I AM NOT SERIOUS!

Knock Knock Who's there? Ada! Ada who? Ada burger for lunch!

Your mother is so white that when she dances, she is off beat a little bit.

Whats green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

Whats worse than the holocaust? Ryan

What happened when the nigga looked up his family tree? A gorilla shit in his face

How do you starve a zombie? You dont, they are allready dead.

how many jews can you fit in a volkswagon? 2 in the front, 2 in the back, and 6 million in the ash trey.

What's the difference bettween the holocaust and a bee, 6 million jews died during the holocaust. Bees make honey.

What is red and ragging? A Hemorrhoid

why was the black kid made fun of at school? Because he was a nerdy boy who drinks tea

When life gives you limes, say hey! wait a second ,aren't these meant to be lemons? then kill yourself

Q: Knock, Knock A: To get to the other side.

Boob

A duck walks into the bar, buys a beer, steals your woman, wins a bar fight, pistol whips a police officer, departs and shouts Aflac

How do you stop a black kid from jumping around in your bedroom? Chuck him out of the house.

How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

Yeah, "master hypnotists" (and do not even get me started on hypnotherapists, they completely suck!) keep claiming that you need to keep up to date with the "constantly developing art of hypnosis" The thing is though, that hypnosis does not develop itself, people develop it further, and when the key ingredient is actually believing things under a certain state, you can do anything, even slow the passage of time to a halt. Once I tried that, I was disappointed when I figured out that it did not work, so I went shopping (for groceries), then realized that no time had passed at all, sounds like bullshit, and yeah I wont be trying that again anytime soon, lucid dreaming is good enough, you can spend hours and hours in a lucid dream state, days, and then wake up and figure out you slept like two hours or something.

Knock Knock Who's there? no one, you've got Psycosis

What is stupid and looks like you? You.

What's brown, black, and red all over? The burning cross on the lawn of a respectable African-American family.

Knock Knock. Who's there? ........ It turns out it was Helen Keller.

Q: Why did Susie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Susie.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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