Q. What's a pirate's favorite type of movie? A. It depends on the individual pirate, although most modern-day pirates are from third world countries like Somalia and so are too poor to be able to watch many movies. Classical pirates like those depicted in Treasure Island or Pirates of the Carribean are, of course, from a period of history before movies had been invented, so couldn't possibly have had a favorite.

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Q: What happened when lost John lost his crack cocaine? A: He bought some weed.

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what happens when a hamster bites your arm? your arm bleeds

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A black man goes down to Alabama in the 1960s; He gets lynched.

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Knock knock! Who's there? A Doorbell salesman.

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Why did the little boy fall asleep? His parent pulled the plug.

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Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a truck? No.

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A boy askes santa for a baby brother. Santa says give me your mom.

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What do you call a man who only eats fast food? Unhealthy.

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my mind's eye?

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Regarding the "I will violate you, your children and your parent if you thumb me red" comment belo. I had a green thumb, I know because I gave it to myself because I am awesome... Now I got none... I person that this this, I cannot wait to X-mas where I will be violating them all, tell them, and as thus remind you that this was their Christmas present from you... Your friendly r*pist neighborhood Moral Man: Yes, I am your neigbor... I cant wait for slot number 24 on my christmas calendar... There is a picture of you and your family... Yummy!

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Why did the paraplegic roll his wheelchair up a steep hill? Because he's crippled.

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How did john walk on the sun? We don't know, he probably burned to death before getting close.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know chickens are absent minded creatures that can aimlessly walk around.

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how do u get a bonar? u look at your mum!!

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-Knock Knock. -Who's there? -Willis. -Wills who? -IT'S ME WILLIS. YOUR SON! -Whatchu talking bout Willis, I ain't got no son. -Remember Bill, my father? I was conceived on your 20th birthday party. .... - Is he fat white Bill, Mexican Bill, or Billette the shemale? And thus, poor Willis jumps off a bridge, committing suicide, because his biological mother turns out to be a shemale screwing whore.

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This joke might just be dumb enough for YOU to find funny

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Why do many men find it difficult to make eye contact? Debilitating autism.

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Where were guinea pigs created? Probably in Guinea Land or something.

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I woke up in bed with someone this morning. ... Hah.

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your mom is so fat.

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I used to be schizophrenic, but we're ok now.

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Say this really fast. Ice Bank Mice Elf It'll take a while for dumbasses to understand.

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? - Because it died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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