What do a snake and a bird have in common... They both fly, except the snake

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Did you here that Hellen Keller got hit by a bus? No. Neither did she.

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Why did the black man get arrested? He didn't pay child support for his 12 bastard children

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Billy: Why do pirates say rrrrr? Mark: I don't know, I'm not a pirate.

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What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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What's worse than getting shot in the face? Nothing really because that could leave you seriously handicapped for the remainder of your life or there is a good chance that you are dead.

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I have an erection My mom!

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what do you call a prostitute with AIDS? Most likely her first name, unless of course you know her and it is normal for you to refer to her by a nickname or some shorter version of her proper first name.

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What is a kangaroos favorite desert? The outback

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why ya gotta be so rude? cause i can

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whats funner than nailing a baby to a wall, ripping it off

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black I'm blind

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? It's me, Jeremy. Oh, great to see you! Come inside. They then have a great time watching TV and eating snacks

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Why doesn't my mom make dinner anymore? she died in a fire on my birthday.

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Why did the kid throw a clock out the window? The kid was probably having a temper tantrum and it was an expression of frustration.

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Why was the kid hungry? Because he lived in Africa.

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What's 6 inches long and 2 inches wide and can drive a woman crazy? Money

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What did Helen Keller name her pet dog? dfhiwueghweigw

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Why did Muhammad pray to Jesus? Because he has low self esteem and didn't believe in himself.

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The Big Band Theory

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Why couldn't Sally ride a bike? She was disabled

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If you were a cactus, why?

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Knock Knock Who's there? UPS you have a package from Amazon. \ Oh, Thanks, where do I sign? Right here. Ok, thanks, have a nice day. Thanks you too.

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how do you stop a baby from crying? hit it with a brick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops