One Direction???? Gifted singers???? HA HA HA

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Not from my wife if that is what you think, but its best people dont know who she is, because you know... A guy that gets many ladies = A playa. A girl that lets his guy do that, well, my wife feels safe about her husband (I am dead honest), but I cant expect people to suddenly go "oh yeah, his wife is totally cool and secure about it all, rather than an insecure idiot that allows him to sleep around like the dog he is) Strictly spoken, I am no dog, women say all men are pigs, but no woman settles for a boy, so that makes me a pig.

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Bill Gates, Jeff Bezos and Elon Musk die and find themselves standing before St. Peter at the Pearly Gates. Actually, that's just speculation. No one really knows what happens when you die. Most likely your consciousness simply stops, and you cease to exist, an eternity of oblivion. But most people can't face this possibility so we have made up comforting stories to attempt to ease our collective fear of death.

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Q: why did the dog fall down the stairs? A: Because I pushed him down.

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Why did the black man begin to cry when his friend aimed a gun at a watermelon? Because if he were to shoot it would be a waste of perfectly good food.

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what happens when a white guy goes to harlem he gets robbed by 5 to 10 black men

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Why was the Mexican running through the desert? A group of bandits had kidnapped his family, raped his sister, drowned his mother, decapitated his father, and now they were coming for him. They are coming...

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Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted.

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What did Grandma give little Ben for Christmas? a wheelchair

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Q: What did the kid say after he told a stupid joke? A: Well they banned me from Anti-Joke!!

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What is long and black? The line at KFC

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A blind man walks into a bar----b wire

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Tell my wife I died doing what I love... Not her

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What happened to the blonde who blew out her birthday candles? Her hair caught on fire

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What happened to the mentaly challenged person is walking down the street? He pooped on the sidewalk and got escorted to his house

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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How do you make a salesperson cry? Shoot him in the face and throw him off a cliff

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scientology.

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Your Mommas so scary slender is afraid of her -_-

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What did the bi-polar girl do when she found our her ex-boyfriend was living with another woman? Nothing; she was happy for their new relationship and realized life moves on, in addition to taking the daily appropriate amount of medication prescribed by her doctor.

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Whats the same about a Mole and an Eagle? They both live underground, I lied about the Eagle.

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How do you get clean dishes? You wash them.

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What color is the bus? Yellow What color is the bus? Yellow What color is the bus? Yellow What color is the kid? Red because he got hit by the bus.

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-Whats not funny and has wheels? >What? -The Holocaust... I was lying about the wheels

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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