What's green and has wheels? Weed. I lied about the wheels.

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Bad grammers.

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NO! Nero created the MULTIVERSE During the sixth day... And on the seventh... He did not get any sleep or rest either...¨ SO THE GREAT EXPLOSION OF ENDORPHIN'S WAS CREATED AND IT WAS GOOD! Moral:"Seriously, get lost, only the trio of the Gods Me,Myself, and I, are worthy of this tribulation!

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A sheep walks into a baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

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Why is a bulldog so aggressive Because it was raised for dog fights in basements Dog fights aren't right kids, and you should never get involved but if you find yourself in the cage fighting one of the dogs, you should really think about how you got there.

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Why did little Bobby put a firecracker in the dog's ass? Don't worry he used lube.

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Q: When do you know you've had to much to drink? A: When the zebra in your belly button starts talking to you

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Two guys jump off a cliff... the third guy calls an ambulance.

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Whats worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an apple and finding half a worm. Wats worse then biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into an eggplant and finding half a worm, as eggplants are usually more expensive so you will have wasted more money and would probably not be willing to eat the rest. And eggplants taste like shit.

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What is white and can fly? A fridge that can't fly.

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why can't a blonde count to 70? cause 69 is a mouth full

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what's worse than both your parents dying? finding out that they were hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt and they left you nothing, including the house, oh and you have to be out by the end of the week, the bank is ready to re-possess the house, especially since your parents haven't paid the mortgage for 8 months. oh, by the way, happy birthday! written by KA

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what's worse than finding a truck full of dead babys taking them out with a pitchfork

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You Mom is so ugly, It makes sense why you always have that look on your face!

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How do u keep annoying children off your front lawn? Molest Them.

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What did the strawberry say to the grape? Nothing, inanimate objects can't use verbal communication.

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jack and jill went up the hill to have a little fun. that dumb ass jill forgot the pill and now they have a son

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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A man walks into a bar...so what? People do it all the time.

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A black kid, a white kid, an Asian, and a Dane all take acid in a room. They have a profound experience and find a greater meaning in life.

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knowck knowck whos there? shea shea who? shea...duh!

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What do you get when you mix a burrito and an earthworm? Diaherea

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here's my two cents worth! *hands you two pennies , entire life savings*

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Hmmm, how would Sherlock Holmes solve a crime?... Oh wait. He doesn't exist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops