What do you get if you cross a canine and a sheep? A Sheepdog. What do you get if you cross a cat and a dog? You fucking stupid? It cant be done!

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A: Roses are red, Violets are blue. B: Then why are they called violets? A: I NEVER NOTICED THAT!

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how do you scare a deaf person? you yawn

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Decode this; Hetay owcay aidsay oomay. Answer: ummmmm.... Let me think....ummm, does anybody speak pig latin?

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Snooki

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What can fly, but is always under you? A flying worm.

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Eeny meeny miny moe, Catch a piglet by its toe, If it squeals let it go, Or you'll be arrested for animal abuse and receive a heavy fine.

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Knock Knock. Who'se there? It's Dave. Dave who? Um, you invited me over here. Open the damn door.

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What do you call a black man riding a bicycle? A good citizen who cares about the environment.

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Why did the gay kid drop his ice cream Because he got punched in the face.

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What did the Japanese man name his black baby? -Som Ting Wong :)

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if life gives you the back.. TOUCH HER ASS

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Why did the bald man die? Cancer.

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What did the blind man say to the fish store owner? I would, 1 fish please.

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THIS!!!!!!! IS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SPARTA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eyepatch? Names.

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This is funny.

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What Makes Me Smile? Face Muscles.

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What did the rock say to the other rock? Nothing, they had just met and both were very shy.

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What did the lawyer name his daughter? Amanda.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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What happend to the Jew when he was near the fire place He very carefully tended to it

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Your mom is so fat that she turns "One Size Fits All" to "One Size Fits Most"

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Jesus, a frog, and Faith Hill walk into a bar. The frog says, "What is this, a joke?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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