Q.Why did the boy fail to complete his homework? A. He was a loaf of bread

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why did the man paint his dog blue? He has some strange mental condition and is incapable of controlling his own actions.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

A blind man walks into a bar. He cannot read the drink menu.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why did 4 Christians, 2 Jews, 1 Muslim, 1 Buddhist and an atheist squeeze into a Honda Accord? One of their co-workers at Appleby's made a compelling case for the financial and environmental benefits of carpooling.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Two mice fell into a bucket of cream. They both promptly drowned.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

minorities

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What do you call a smart blond? There aren't any so there shouldn't be a name for it.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Knock knock, Who's there The delivery man The delivery man who Just take this package

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What is funnier than a dead baby? almost everything. there is nothing funny about a dead baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Yo mamma is so fat She has to wear big pants and is easily fatigued.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why was the young women crying Because her fiancé who was battling a severe Case of pneumonia just passed away

thumb_up thumb_down +30

A bear walks into a bar and kills every one

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What is the difference between a rabbit and a plum? A: They are both purple, except for the rabbit!

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Roses are red Violets are blue You're daughter has terminal cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A man walks into the bar and asks the bartender, "Are you smelling me right now?"

thumb_up thumb_down +28

How can you shed 10 pounds in one day? Get your legs amputed.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

So a guy walks into a bar. It hurt really bad. He was pissed, so he went home and took his seal to a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A Jew walks into a bar screaming cause he just broke his face

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Q. What's the difference between a Mcdonalds employee and a gynecologist? A. They have different jobs.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

selena gomez & justin beiber go in space. selena says im hotter than the sun. the way she knows this information is that she is near the sun at this time justin beiber has already drifted off in space.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What did one banana say to the other banana? Answer: It didnt say anything because bananas are inanimate objects, so it isn't humanly possible for a banana to speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven hundred and eighty nine.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

5 little monkeys jumping on the bed. one fell off and bumped his head. momma called the doctor and the doctor said "your son is now a vegetable. he can no longer use his brain for things such as moving, talking, or eating. you are going to have to take care of him for the rest of his life. it is also going to be a burden on you and your husband because taking care of someone in this condition is very expensive, and could end up costing thousands of dollars each year."

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops