What's the hardest part about being a pedophile? Fitting in.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was suicidal.

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Why do cats have nine lives? Because they don't have ten.

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What's the difference between a plum and bunny? They're both purple, except the bunny.

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You still alive? I used to be called proteus by the way, but then you disappeared and Neronism or watever its called now turned insane. I mean we killed you man! Out of mercy, you telling me a jacket changed you and everything? Where have you been? Six million followers? And all the shit that has made "moral man" the most lauded thing on Horsehead is you? Mind helping me make sense out of all of this?

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why did Helen Keller's dog commit suicide? you would too if your name was uuhuhuhduhh

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Two women are sitting on a park bench, minding their own business, saying nothing.

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One man said to another, "Hey, can you hear that?" "No." He replied.

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A man walked into a bar with his friend. He drinks a certain amount of beers, and has his friend safely drive him home.

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2 men walk into a bar. 3 come out

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What's heed and has wheels? Your mom.

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he found out the oreo he slept with last night had aids and he wanted to make sure he didnt get the deadly disease so he went to the doctor to get tested.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? To get to the other side!

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A midget, a nun, and a kangaroo walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

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Why did the Dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Why was the man sad? His intestines were imploding and his head was shot off seventeen seconds ago.

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How do you sneak Jews across the border? In an ashtray.

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What do you get when you mix a ginger with gasoline? a forest fire.

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When life gives you lemons.... Don't eat them, because you're probable hallucinating, and you don't know where they came from.

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Whats worse than seeing your mom naked. Your dad.

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Why did the white guy die because he had cancer

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A guy dared his friend to jump off a bridge for 10 bucks. His friend, fearing for his life did not jump.

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What's better than finding Jesus in your room? Finding Chuck Norris in your bed.

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Knock Knock. Come in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops