how do you stop a speeding car? Put your foot on the brake

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What did the mexican do after he finished his taco? He was eaten by a dinosaur.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Chinese. What? Knock Knock.

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Roses are red. Violets are violet.

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Why did little Annie fall off the swing? Cause her penis was too heavy.

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Why was the dwarf nicknamed The Anaconda? Because everybody loves a bit of irony.

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Life

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well use a tissue!

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What do you get when you cross a rusty nail and a foot? Tetanus

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad with colours Nice tits

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Me- hey hitler you lost soemthing. hitler- Vat? Me-world war two.

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What does the rubbish do when it is depressed? It breaks down.

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what leaves a bigger memory than a passionate kiss? A STAB WOUND!

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A Russian who dosen't like vodka

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The other day I went into the bathroom to take a poo, It was Glorious I flushed the toilet and everything.

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Why do teens say "dude?" They feel unloved at home and must know that they posses a strong relationship with their peers, and in fact, cannot maintain a proper friendship due to the four letter word known as "dude."

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I have a black guy on my family tree. He's my cousin.

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I was walking down the street the other day and I saw this lady and suddenly: POTATOES!!!!!!!!!

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A rooster is sitting on the top of a house. It lays an egg. Which way does it roll? This can be solved by using the dimensions and angles of the roof to find the most probable direction it would roll (Incorporating in the power of gravity of course). Of course if the egg from the roosters uteris came out in an akward or unlikely way, it could roll the other way.This can be factored in very quickly because with the video evidence of the rooster having the egg you can see how it was delivered(the video is not of which way it rolls, just of the delivery).

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America needs to burn Less fossil fuels to save the environment

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What do you call a Black guy who flies planes? A pilot

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Knock, knock! Who's there?! Your Mom! Your Mom who? No really. Let me in.

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What's the hardest part about being a pedophile? Fitting in.

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Wanna hear a joke? Womens rights ;) Wanna hear another joke? Too bad i'm not gonna tell you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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