"Hey dude, wanna come with me??" "Sure! Where????" "To the gorcery store, I need to buy a couple of lemons."

A magician was driving down the road and turned into a driveway...

Why did the fat man hit the ground before the skinny man? Because he jumped first.

Do you know what the zombie said? Raaargh Brains

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm What is worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Finding chuck norris Whats worse than finding your girlfriend has a bigger Slong than you? Getting raped with a cheese grater. Whats worse than all of these? Being black Sadly im black :( -Jordan M

how did the doctors try to cure stephen hawking? turn him off then back on again

How did I do in the running events? Not that good, I'm a paraplegic.

Enough Red to share, RAWR! With me only though! But hey, do me a favor wear your glasses not your contact lenses. "That anime" do you watch anime? Or hentai or whatever?

What did batman say to robin when they got to their car? Get in the car

What do you call a man that's not funny? An un - funny man!

how many poeple does it take to change a light bulb? you spelled people wrong.

Why didn't Clair get up all day? She died in her sleep.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer Roses are red

Why did the chickens leave McDonalds? Because they refused to have their nuggets deep fried (Wyndellberg)

Why did Obama give a speech? Because he is the president and people look up to him

Jew logic fail: Jew: We have endured suffering for thousands of years! Guy: And how old are you again? Jew: eight. Moral: If you see a goddamn moral in this one then post it yourself :P

The sentence below is an anti-joke.

911 jokes are just plane wrong

We got him in about five minutes, the kid will already be exhausted by the point we get to him, r rather, he gets to us. Pretty quick for a small geek I got to say, the photography we got of him is an obvious Photoshop, but he seems similar enough I guess. I would call, but it seems someone has been messing with all other "Erron`s" homes and phones if I had not dropped mine, I would not have noticed we have been bugged for a while, pretty professional gear too,

The Charlotte Bobcats

Why did the male propagate the female? Because he was drugged. Slyly, this foxy female had slipped the male the date rape drug and a dangerous amount of viagra. During intercourse, the male ripped a gaping hole in the female's stomach and killed her. He woke up confused inside a dead stinking corpse.

What does Pluto and a creamsicle have in common? Neither of them are a planet.

I got into an argument with my friend the other day. He contested that the onion was the only food that could make you cry, so I beat his wife to death with a coconut,

A baby seal walks into a club.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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