A man called the police and was later arrested for murdering himself,

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What did the guy say when he dropped his baby? "oh no!"

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Why did the white man cross the road? To pay his taxes.

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Bob: Hey Jim, what's up? Jim: Obviously the sky, oh and i see a few planes too. by the way why are you asking me why don't you just look up?

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Q; How did the blind man cross the road? A; very unsuccessfully leaving behind memories of his joys but soon forgotten smile

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What do you call a Mexican in a suit? Another Drug lord What do you call a black guy in a suit? Guilty. What do you call a white guy in a suit? The black guys lawyer What do you call a woman in a suit? You don't call her anything as you wonder why she isnt in the kitchen. What do you call a women outside a kitchen? Useless. -Jordan.M

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OH MY LUMPIN GOD!

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Steve Mullings isn't on drugs

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A: go away. B: No i won't A: Shutup B: Yes i will not go away A: again, shutup B: I left A: Thank you B: Your welcom A: Thank you for saying your welcome B: Thank you for saying thank you that i'm welcome A: Thank you for saying thank you for saying that I thank you that you're welcome.

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what did the man say to the sad woman? go make ma a sammich before i hit you again! the women refused and was hit again.

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What did the butler say to the guest while his master is in the bathroom? Butler: "Sir, will you wait while the Master bathes?" Guest: "How long will he be, I'm quite busy!" Butler: "He shouldn't be long sir, he should be finishing up now."

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What is Hitler's least favorite month? July...

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Doctor doctor, I feel like listening to good music. Looks like you need "The Cure" to help with this.

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what did the girl say when she lost her shoe where is my shoe

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Q:how many ping-pong balls do you need te get a crocodile off of a slide ? A:none, because an engine doesn't have doors

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Why do Vampires drink your blood? Because the movie maker needed a story

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What is the difference between the sky and the ocean? They're both blue.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Knock Knock Who's there? 20 20 Who? 24

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Why is French Fries not a Chinese Food? Answer: Because the Chinese people will get offended.

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Roses are blue Violets are polka dot I suck at rhyming Pandas

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What's worse than finding another worm in your apple? Another Holocaust

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I donated to Kony 2012. Litterally to Kony. I approve of his actions.

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What did the ice cream man ask the little boy? Want some ice cream?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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