What grows best during the cold Winter season? The number of deaths among homeless people.

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Math teacher: I have 5 bottles in one hand, and 6 in the other. What do I have? Student: A drinking problem. _._._

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Did you hear about the man who discovered the secret to making women happy? Neither have I.

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roses are black violets are grey... im color blind sorry

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What do you call most people over 50 who aren't married. Divorced

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How did the clown crash his car? A horrible tornado chrashed through the town.

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What is the difference between a boyscout and a Jew? Boys outs come home from camp.

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Why did the boy throw the clock out the window? He was severely depressed.

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As far as I know, the day after tomorrow is going to be YOUR lucky day, because you will be tasting sausage for the first time with your lower lips... No seriously, you cant be virgin, you can tell me the truth, you like 24 or something?

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Anti-Joke is a silver bullet.

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A man claims to own a talking dog. A skeptic approaches the man and his dog and asks for a demonstration. The man asks his dog, "How does sandpaper feel?" The dog says, "Ruff!" The skeptic is not convinced. The man then asks his dog, "Who is the greatest baseball player of all time?" The dog, who like all dogs cannot fully comprehend human speech, proceeds to lick his balls.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill. Jill was dehydrated.

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If life gives you lemons your hallucinating

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Why did the old man order the little girl into the car? Because he was her grandfather.

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why did the bear fall out of the tree? He died. Why did the raccoon fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the bear.

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Why was the young women crying Because her fiancé who was battling a severe Case of pneumonia just passed away

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What is the difference between baseball and the holocaust? One is a fun sporting event…. The other is baseball.

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once you go black you prefer not to date any white people

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Why are Pine trees green? Because light reflects at different wavelengths, and the chlorophyll, found in chloroplasts, being abundant in the needles of pine trees, Reflect the correct wavelength for green.

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Doctor Doctor i've got wind can you give me something? Thats not wind the doctor replies thats a rare form of stomach cancer.

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Have you ever seen the episode of the powerpuff girls where they save the day?

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Justin's humor

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Why was the Jamaican man smoking pot? His doctor prescribed it. The man has a serious case of glaucoma.

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There was an american man on the way to work.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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