Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the slaughterhouse was on the other side.

What did Batman say to Robin after they got on the bus? We should have taken the batmobile.

What did the blonde waitress say to the man with a curly moustache? Good evening, are you ready to order?; yes [x2]; and what would you like with it?; certanly; there you go; no, I'm sorry; right.

Me "knock knock" Tramp "who's there" Me "nobody you havent got a door"

Why did the tornado cross the road? Because it's a tornado, that's what tornadoes do.

If a small quiz is a quizicle then what is a small test? A quiz.

Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? It was a cold day

What has 4 legs and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you a pool table

What do you call a 3 legged dog on a red unicycle? An unlikely set of circumstances.

What did a policeman say to his belly? Nothing. Because he knows his belly is incapable of speech.

"...."-Hellen Keller

An Italian leaves the mofia

The kid wakes up in the middle of the night to get some water. But over hears sounds from his parents room. he looks through the keyhole. Then he comtinues walking and says. "Why does mom say i cant suck things?"

why do fat people eat so much? who cares

Why was the couple in the waiting room crying? Because their son was diagnosed of AIDS and will probably not live into his twenties.

A grandma says come on twinkies and the teinkies say were terriosts from your lost hole

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What did you get for your birthday? I got older

Q: What did the bulbasaur say to the charmanderr?? A: bulbasaurrr

I flipped through the Yellow Pages, made a few calls, and found the Chinese man I was looking for.

If a picture is worth a thousand words, what is a video worth?

Girl: I wrote a poem. Boy: Let's hear it! Girl: I like you, thats a start. You don't, so we are growing apart. In my heart there's a little tear, its funny to see how much you care. I hate the way you played my heart. You never finish what you start. Boy: Cool. Whose is for? Girl: You... Boy: Wow ummm, I have to go to......................yeah bye.

what do you call a tall skiny kid with a very big ego autistic

what did the blue paint say to the red paint? i am blue

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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