How many fingers do u have? 11 Start with left pinky count 10,9,8,7,6 then 6+5=11

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Finding this website has distracted me and has taken up a large majority of my time.

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Kid: "Tell me about when you were young, Grandpa." Grandpa: "Oh, sonny, those were crazy times. My friends and I were out of control. We used to give each other wet-willies and funny arm. We'd play dandy-balls and legs-a-spread and penis-butt." Kid: "Sounds kind of gay, Grandpa. " Grandpa: "It was gay. Everyone was. But, back then, we were called pole-fancies. It was real, good old-fashioned "grab the nearest tree and hold on for dear life" gay, not today's fancy, featherbed, thread-count gay. People got hurt back then! Kid "That's gay." Grandpa: "Yeah, it was pretty gay "

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A man wearing a chicken t-shirt and holding a pair of dentures walks into the Youtube headquarters, then immediately walks out in fear of getting a copyright strike.

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are you from hawaii? because your the only ten I see

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A guy is at a party and he's really thirsty, so he goes to get a drink. He goes to get some soda, but the line is too long. He goes to get some water, but the line is also too long. He goes to get some punch, and it turns out there's no punch line.

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? Jews are people

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How do you kill a blonde? There are countless ways to complete such a task all of which have infinite variations.

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline. Notice how Anti-Joke MISSPELLED "user", writing "uses" instead. Probably most of you didn't notice until I posted this :)

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I know where you live. No seriously im looking at you through your window. 80% of you just checked. 90% of you didnt realize i just ended that statement with a question mark. 100% of you just checked gotcha

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why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a tomato.

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hey! Wanna hear a bird joke? No. Well this is Hawkward....

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"Free to play" Play free "right now" "Free forever"

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Roses are dead Violets are too Were all gonna die So are you.

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What's the best time to go to the dentist? When your tooth breaks or you need braces.

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If the blue man lives in the blue house, the red man lives in the red house and the green man lives in the green house, where does the orange man live? In the orange house.

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You see how lame this is?

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Why did the KFC worker dislike his job? He was paid lower than minumum wage due to the plummeting economy.

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I have aids

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Casey Anthony kills a baby

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Have you ever tasted Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

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Women. Can't live with them. Can't systemically murder them without compromising the reproductive integrity of the species.

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What is a slave fighting in a pit of Rome? Just a slave. Who cares?

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Whats worse then getting AIDS Math class

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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