Why did the chicken cross the road? He actaully never did. He only made it half way before a cop issued him with an infringement notice for jaywalking.

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You were adopted and I couldn't think of a good way to tell you...

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A Brick

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What's funnier than a dead baby? Almost everything. Infant mortality rates are incrediby high in many third world countries, and it is certainly no laughing matter.

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One game a Packers Player scored a touchdown and jumped into the stands. When everybody was touching him one girl put her hand on the inside of his thigh. He told the girl " If your hand goes a little higher you'll feel my touchdown spike."

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A man crashed his boat and is lost in the ocean. He comes across a cruise ship, and they ask if he wants help. The man says, "No. God will save me, but thanks anyway." Later on that night, he is eaten by a shark.

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How many jews can you fit in a car? As many as the compacity of the car can hold and how big the jews are

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What did the man in need of a prosthetic arm get from the hospital? A diagnosis for cancer.

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I had a really funny joke about a dead baby...but I threw it out

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What's the quickest way to a man's heart? A knife.

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What happened when the man lost his sandwich? He couldnt eat.

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Johny wanted a pogo stick for his birthday. Johny's mom got him a pogo stick for his birthday. The day of Johny's birthday, he fell off the pogo stick and broke his arm.

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Why couldnt the dog bark? The dog didnt exist.

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What did the man say when he put his penis in the blender? Arghhhhhhh!

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? a fridge was thrown at her

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Your dad is so abusive that he hurts you when he losses his temper

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A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette have a contest to see who can get the most likes on their profile pictures. They are all attention-whores.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in every apple.

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What time is it? 20:45.

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What do Kim Kardashian, Paris Hilton, and Pamela Anderson all have in common? All of their last names end with an "n"

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Roses are red Violets are blue... Violets are not blue they are actually purple

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your mothers so over weight that when she jumps in a pool she displaces a proportionately larger volume of water then someone with less body mass.

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Whats better then winning a gold medal at the special olympics????? NOT BEING RETARDED!!!!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops