Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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A child walks into a classroom.

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A black man and a midget walk into a bar. They notice the beverages are unreasonably priced so they leave.

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what did the black man say to the white girl? He respectfully asked her out on a date and theyve been happily dateing ever since.

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Two Jewish men walk into a bar...just kidding it was a gas chamber.

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What did the boy say to his friend? nothing, they were both deaf

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Your city streets are so bumpy that cars get flat tires when going to the gas station.

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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What do Selena and Justin, Kate and William, and Barack and Michelle all have in common? Nothing.

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Q: Why was the old man sad? A: Because he has a quarter super glued to the bottom of his foot

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Your mother is so fat that occasionally she'll have more than one serving of preserves on her toast in the morning

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What do you call an asian with a small penis? Whatever his name happens to be.

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if a man is alone in the forest, and there are no women around to hear him...........is he still wrong?

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Why do Jews have such big noses? They don't; To suggest phenotypic variation along religious lines is preposterous.

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Why don't dinosaurs eat other dinosaurs? They're all dead.

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What do you call a white man who murdered his whole family? -a murder What do you call a black man who raped five women? -a rapest What do you call a Mexican with a leaf blower -a hardworking legal immigrant working twelve hours seven days a week to support his wife and three children.

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My aunt said slow and steady wins the race....... She died in a fire

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How do you embarrass an archaeologist? Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What's worse than having an ugly face? AIDS

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What's larger than a grandmother clock? Plenty of things.

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How did little Jimmy survive the 5 story fall? He didn't

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Roses are red, violets are blue, whoever met you is a BIG fool

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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