What do a grape and an Elephant have in common? For sensitivity to people who suffer from color blindness, this joke has been cancelled.

A man goes to an amusement park. He heads straight for the roller-coaster and gets in line. When he gets to the front, the ride operator informs him that he is too short to ride. "You must be at least 48 inches, sir, you just barely miss the mark, I'm sorry, I can't let you ride." The man is sad, but he doesn't let this little discrepancy ruin his day. He then gets in line for a different ride.

Yeah sure, you have "absolutely... ...No... ...Reason..." to... Fucking... use... This... place... at... all... But you seem to be here all the fucking time, what fucking sense does that make? That is not the matter at all fagface! Your fucking goons assaulting me because "I stole one of your aliases?" I was born Nero and will die fucking Nero, not Nerometal, not Nero of Neronism, just Nero your friendly rapist! Yeah Ill give you my fucking social info, so you... and... your... excessive... use... of... this shit... can... send... your ...fucking assholes to finish the job! Listen bitch! I am a writer! And your faggots stabbed off like half of my eyeball! I don't give a damn about this site, I want your fucking assholes to stop seeking me out in person! Hell, give me your social info, so we can "make a fucking settlement" Where I break off your head and shit down your neck!

sometimes when im bored i dress in white pour water on the ground and roll around in it and pretend im a papertowel

A spaceship enters a black hole. A spaceship enters a black hole. A spaceship enters a black hole.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Me. You who? Me.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Go home and hang yourself.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

Yo mamma's so short that she is 12 inches below the average height of a woman at her age.

Your momma is so dumb she has to have weekly tutoring to help understand finding the value of x in an equation.

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

i told my parents that i was having friends come over my dad said great my mom said great so i said great

Knock, knock. Whose there? Me. Leave.

Q. What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A.One's a scum-sucking bottom feeder, and the other's a human.

What is the difference between you and a brick? A brick gets laid.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, but it was delicious.

Why couldn't the boy watch the R-rated movie? Cuz he was blind.

Q: What's green and goes round and round and round? A: A baby on a blender

What did the woman get for her 18th birthday? Stabbed to death.

why is the sky blue? - because you have herpes.

Why couldn't Sophie brush her hair? She had leukemia

Three guys went hunting on a rainy day. The first guy slipped.

J.D. has 10 vaginas and 2 penis's

yo momma is so fat that she got diabetes and lost her legs

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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