What did one dog say to the other dog? Bark.

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What's worse than watching the Hunger Games? Playing the Hunger Games

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Why did the spider cross the road? He was stuck to the bottom of my shoe!

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Knock Knock Who's there? The KGB Yes, How can I help? We are looking for a local serbian mobster who we believe to be hiding in this Village have you seen this man. No I cant say I have. Sorry Well thank you for your time and if you notice anything please try and let the local Police know.

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I'm hungry.

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if a dog won't bark, there's no way you can teach it to talk.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Cause she's a woman

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If you saw two guys named Hambone and Flippy, which one would you think liked dolphins the most? I'd say Flippy, wouldn't you? You'd be wrong, though. It's Hambone.

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What do you do if a black man throws a gernade at you? You take the pin out, and throw it back.

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Q. Why did the triceratops die? A. A giant meteor hit him.

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Why did suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock - who's there? Bob -bob who.... Bobs knocking for suzie!

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whats black and white and red all over? a zebra crossing after a horrible, horrible car accident

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knock knock, whos there? billy i dont know who you are, please get away from my front door before i call the authorities

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Knock Knock Who's there? ........

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An irish man walks out of a bar

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Why did the mexican wash his car? The car was dirty

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Hey, I just met you. Nice to meet you.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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What's the difference between a bag of dead babies and a Ferrari? I have a bag of dead babies in my garage.

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Q: What does the fox say? A: Nothing. Foxes cannot talk.

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a horse walks into a bar the bartender says "why such the long face?" the horse is now crying in tears because the bartender made him. by Brennan pickrell

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What Do You Call The White House When Obama Is President? What? The White House.

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Why didn't the cat eat its supper? It was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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