Q: What do a dead cat and a flower have in common. A: Nothing, just go away.

What did the dyslexic boy get for Christmas? A laptop. And he was very happy.

I'm not gay (phrase) - A phrase commonly used by straight men.

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

What is brown and sounds like a pickle? Poop

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 took sexual advantage of 9.

im a barbie girl in a barbie world !!!! no your not its not phisicly possible for a plastic doll to have any form of feelings !!!!!

The other day I was talking to this guy... Nice guy

knock knock who's there? Madeline McCann really? no

what's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? one is fun to hit with a sledge hammer, and one is a watermelon

What came first the chicken or the egg? Neither, chickens have been extinct since 1987.

Q what's worse than Tori's singing A absolutely nothing !

What's worse than watching the Hunger Games? Playing the Hunger Games

Cum on guys, gay jokes arent funny!

Why did the spider cross the road? He was stuck to the bottom of my shoe!

This statement is false.

How may Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side!

Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he was eaten alive!!!

If you are stranded on a deserted island would you eat your hand or the 5 star meal you butter prepared? -Matt

What did one dog say to the other dog? Bark.

If all ziggles are zaggles and all zaggles are zumbles, then why is your mother a whore?

Why don't elderly people act their age? because they die.

Your mums so stupid. She bought an apple for 35p even though the shop across the road sells them for 34p

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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