What do you call a Mexican in a kitchen? A chef.

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Some Minions have one eye, others have two. And nobody seems to care.

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Why did the rooster die. Because I killed it.

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why did suzy drop her ice cream? she got hit by a bus. knock knock. whos there? not suzy.

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Sally walked into a bar and asked for a drink. Because she was under 21 they denied her request,

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What would you do when pigs fly? Pigs cannot fly, therefore this question is impractical.

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What's the difference between a chicken and a bartender? A chicken is a domesticated fowl, a subspecies of the red junglefowl. As one of the most common and widespread domestic animals, with a population of more than 24 billion in 2003, there are more chickens in the world than any other species of bird. Humans keep chickens primarily as a source of food, consuming both their meat and their eggs. A bartender is a person who mixes and serves alcoholic drinks at a bar. also bar-tender ; 1836, American English,

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What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

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Fun Fact: If humans stood in a single file line around the equator, most of them would drown.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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A grasshopper hops into a bar. The bartender looks down at him and says "Hey, we have a drink named after you." the grasshopper looks up at the bartender...then proceeds to hop along because Grasshoppers can't communicate with humans. Then several of the bars patrons looked at the bartender, worried for his mental health.

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im a willy bum bum

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Q. Why did Michael Jackson call Boys II Men? A. He thought it was a home delivery service.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Beacuse she has no arms or legs. Knock knock. Who's There? Not Sally.

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What do you call a cat with no tail? A Manx cat

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Chuck Norris." "Chuck Norris who?" "NOBODY SAYS 'CHUCK NORRIS WHO'!!!"

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What has eyes but can't see? Helen Keller. What has ears but can't hear? A field of corn.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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whats green and has wheels grass and i lied about the wheels

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Wh ydo i Hate you? 'COs Your a Gimp!

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Billy was so silly that he named his pet zebra Spot.

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Want to hear a joke? Jerry Sandusky's innocence

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Why didn't the black man make it into heaven? No one did, there is no evidence supporting the existence of an afterlife.

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What does a joke and an anti-joke have in common? Nothing, since "anti-" refers to the opposite of the word that it is modifying.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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