What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A drum set.

Why was the family sad? Their house burnt down.

What did the jacket say to the girl? Zip me up wait why am I talking

A man walked into the woods... Sorry, I forgot the rest of the joke...

Yo momma so fat she when god said let there be let he said get the fuck out the way!

Person 1: Hey how's your day? Person 2: Good Person 1: Cool

what did the little boy see when he walked into his parents bed room a bed

what's up? my penis.

What is intangible and has every color on the rainbow? A rainbow.

kid: dad! a kid called me gay today! dad: son, im 100% ok with u hurting that kid! kid: i cant! hes too cute.

Why was the man late for work? Because he slept in.

Q: what is blue and floats in a pool? A: a baby Q: what is purple and at the bottom of the pool? A: the baby 5 minutes later

A man wakes up after a long night with a girl he recently met. He pulls out a cigarette, and looks for his lighter, but can not find it. He asks the girl if she has a lighter and she replies "There might be some matches in the top drawer of my dresser." He opens the top drawer and finds some matches.

Doctor Doctor i've got wind can you give me something? Thats not wind the doctor replies thats a rare form of stomach cancer.

Yo mamma is so fat She has to wear big pants and is easily fatigued.

Mario walks into a bar A yak walks into a bar An orange walks into a bar 30 men barf in a juicy yot

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it was hit by a car

Q: What's pink and fuzzy? A: Pink Fuzz...

What do Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder have in common? They are both blind.

I'm a white rapper I do it all the time Folks don't like me cuz my words don't match

Why do vampire's from 'Twilight' sparkle? Because it's a really bad movie.

how come timmy didnt brush his teeth he didnt have a toothbrush

A catholic priest gets a nun pregnant. He drowns the baby several months later.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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