Why did the crack addict see colors. He was looking at the northern lights

The only thing you need to call a woman that starts with "B" is "Beautiful" Biitches love to be called beautiful

What was Steve Jobs' favorite fruit? Grapes.

What did Mars say to warn Prehistoric Earth before an asteroid hit it? Nothing, sound can't travel through space, it's a vacuum. The dinosaurs will be missed.

It's the police sir. There's been an accident.

Transgenders! More than meets the eye! Transgenders! Girl was once a guy! LGBTs wage the battle to destroy The homophobic forces of Christianity! Transgenders! Homos in disguise!

What did one rock say to the other rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk, idiot.

What's the best time to visit a dentist? Generally every six months or so.

What do you call a gay Chinese math teacher? A gay Chinese math teacher.

Why did the kid give a bad presentation in class? He knew basically nothing about the topic, and on top of that had a large erection.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have aids, and now you do too!

A man walked into a lampost. He hurt himself.

What did the boy with no legs get for Christmas? Dance Dance Revolution

Two women are sitting next to each other in a bar minding their own business.

In Soviet Russia life had both pros and cons.

what do you call a mexican in a coffee shop? a customer and/or worker in the coffee shop.

Hi rebecca , its me that guy over there. purple moneky blue dishwasher. aka JUMANJIIII

Why did the cat land on it's back.... because its dead .......

No really, try this: You: Say "knock, knock" Your friend: OK, knock knock You: Who's there? Your friend: ...... [this awkward pause makes evident the fact that it has now dawned on your friend that he has to generate content for a joke that he wasn't telling in the first place]

Knock knock Who there? A mute Bullshit

How do you blind fold an asian? Dental floss!

What do you call an iphone in a puddle? Broken

Titanic with will smith. Girl: I wont ever let go of you. Leo: Drowns. Smith: Move your fat ass over girl, there is like room for me and fifthy kids there yo! Me: Bitch if you need to float on a piece of wood where six of us could fit, im gonna drown you.

Peg leg Pete, yay, I know stuff too, I watched that one all the time when I was a girl.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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