your mother is so fat that she bought a treadmill and uses it daily. she already lost 20 lbs.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is dead, and thereby lacks the necessary motor control.

How did the Jew escape the concentration camp? He didn't he was caught and put in the gas chamber.

If a tree falls in the forest, and only a deal man is there at the time, does it make a sound? And what are his odds of not being trapped under it, awaiting rescue?

What looks like donuts but stinks of shit. Sean Big Macs socks

two men walked into a bar the last one ducked

Are you a tree

42

What did the boy get at the bowling alley for his birthday? a corpse. *from Bones

A Priest, a Rabbi and an Imam all get on the same flight. About half-way through an engine begins to smoke and stutters to a halt. Fortunately, the pilot has been trained for these situations and lands the aircraft safely.

How do you know that you tv has been stolen? It's no longer there.

Why didn't the Priest have a TV ? A black man stole it

2 + 2 = fish

Girlfriend has 10 letters, but then again, so does freeeeedom

A group of teenage boys put a flaming bag of dog feces on Old Man Howard's doorstep. He came out and demanded that they stop such behavior at once. They did, and the day went on normally.

roses are red violets are blue most poems rhyme but this one doesnt

After thinking hard for a very long time, the pig realized he was a fat, worthless piece of shit.

What do a plum and a rabbit have in common? They are both purple except for the rabbit.

What is red and green and goes 50mph? A frog in a blender

A programmer, and engineer and an accountant meet up for an after work drink. Afterwards they go home to their separate apartments and think how socially inadequate they are.

why did the mom beat up her son with downs because he was matt daly

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

A white man a black man a french man and a mexican are on a sinking ship. The French man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of begets over board. The Black man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of red hot cheetos overboard The Mexican man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of Tacos over board. And then the White man says "we have too many of these" and throws the Mexican man overboard

A man went to the doctor. He had experienced some strong abdominal pain. The doctor looked at him and ordered some tests to be done. He had a kidney stone. The day after he passed the stone, he got ran over by a bus. The man's name was Bob.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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