how do you put a giraffe in a fridge? open the door, put the giraffe in and close the door. how do you put an elephant in a fridge? open the door, take out the giraffe, put the elephant in and close the door. the lion king is holding a conference in the jungle and all the animals turn up except for one, which animal is missing? the elephant, it's in the fridge. you come across a river you need to cross, but it is infested with man-eating crocodiles, how to you cross the river without dying? just swim across, all the crocodiles are at the conference.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

yo mama's so fat her stomach mass weighs more than people who dont have as much fat as her.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A 21 year old man walks into a bar with a vase of 12 roses. 57 years later he died after a lengthy battle with colon cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Q: What's worse than dropping your phone in water? A: Throwing water at your phone.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Whats pink and fluffy? Pink Fluff.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

why did Sally fall of the swing....she had no arms. knock knock who's there? NOT Sally.....

thumb_up thumb_down -18

whats softer than a furry blanket an indian

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Knock Knock Who's There? Hi, I'm just going through the neighborhood to let everyone know that women secretly enjoy being raped.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's the difference between a rabbit and a Rabbi? Rabbits are of the family Leporidea, whereas Rabbi's are Jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A man walks into a bar and is promptly escorted out because it is a bar for cats only.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did Jesus and his friends get crucified? So they could sing: "Always look at the bright side of life" Moral: Monty Python?

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why should you be concerned when you see a mexican riding a bike? because he probably wasnt wearing a helmet

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did Old Man Robert fall down the stairs? Someone kicked him down. And then he died.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

your mammas so poor she is probably going die in a few days of starvation

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Guy 1: What the shit is that car? Guy 2: Its not a car. It's an alfa romeo

thumb_up thumb_down -20

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Are you from Nebraska? 'Cuz you're the only ten i see.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Whats worse than swinging a dead baby by a rope? Stopping it with a shovel.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? A nugget

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a cannibal.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's black and blue and hates sex? The 8 year old in my trunk

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why didn't the cheese buy a house plant? Cheese is nonliving and therefore cannot earn money, thus preventing cheese from buying houseplants.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Yo mamma is so old that she died.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What do you have if you have a green ball in your right hand and a green ball in your left hand? Two green balls.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops