A: what did one apple say to the other apple. B: Nothing apples cant talk

thumb_up thumb_down +30

One time, as a dare, John was forced to eat 5 king size chocolate bars, 3 cakes, 8 Oreo Milkshakes, and 7 packages of Krispy Kreme Donuts. As a result, John has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Knock Knock Who's there? Interrupting owl Interrupting owl- HOOOOOOOOOOOO

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What's the difference between a Ferrari and 50 dead babies? Where the hell would you even find 50 dead babies? That would be really disturbing.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Yo mama is so short, she has trouble reaching the top shelf.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What do you call it when you kill a Jewish homosexual? Murder.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Whats old and has been alone for years. Your dead nan

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why was 6 afraid of seven? seven commited statitory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8, murdered nine, was sent to jail for life, let out early for community service, and told 6 he was coming forhim 6 months later.... 6 commited suicide by jumping off a cliff his body was never found his family didnt get to say good bye thats why 6 is afraid of 7

thumb_up thumb_down +24

How did the girl cross the road? -She didn't, she died because she was blind and didn't see the "don't walk" sign.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Whats brown and sticky? Brown paint,

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Have you heard the one about the blonde and the bear? No. Me neither.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why'd the guy fall off the building? I pushed him

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did Justin Bieber jump out of the airplane? He didn't, i pushed him

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why can't Bin laden drive because he's dead

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why the guy without two hands at the beach was so excited? Because he couldn't scratch his asshole.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

If a tree falls on a deaf person, does anyone care?

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q: What would happen if Chuck Norris was hit by an Astroid A: He would die.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Ok good, just checking. It would be a shame for your perishable foodstuffs to go bad.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

"Did you fall from heaven?...Cause your face is really messed up."

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What is white and black and red all over.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

My dad calls me a son of a bitch and I'm like "hey! You married her"

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What did the salami say to the ham? Nothing; meat can not talk

thumb_up thumb_down +18

when life gives you lemons you make lemonade when life gives you a homisidle brige you clearly have done something to make life angery

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops