What was a hard time for people? the great depression

What do trees and people have in common? If you hit them enough times with an axe they will fall over.

A deaf man is listening to the radio. Think about it.

Three men walk into a bar. The first guy bought two drinks, the second guy bought three drinks, can you guess what the third guy bought? A tazer.,

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, It's none of my business.

what sucks blows and gets laid in the closet. YOUR MOM VACUMING

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a worm on the other side. And the more pressing question is why do i watch a chicken in my free time

A burglar broke into a house one night. He picked up a CD player to place in his sack and a strange, disembodied voice echoed from the dark, saying, "Jesus is watching you." He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. When he heard nothing more, he shook his head, clicked the light on, and began searching for more valuables. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, he heard, "Jesus is watching you." Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot. "Did you say that?" he hissed at the parrot "Yep," the parrot confessed, then squawked, "I'm just trying to warn you." The burglar relaxed. "Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?" "Moses," replied the bird. "Moses?" the burglar laughed. "What kind of people would name a bird Moses?" "Devout Semites," the parrot replied.

How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Let's ride bikes!!

why do german shower have eleven holes? jews have 10 fingers

A Johnson walks into a hole. Why am I in this hole? Because rape is not an option.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Ya. Ya Who? Dot Com.

A kid who lost parents is called an orphan and a wife who lost her husband is called a widow. What do you call parents who lost their child? Free on the Weekends.

What did the doctor say to the recently diagnosed AIDS patient? I'm sorry there is nothing we can do.

Actually it was me Josh brown

Two rolls are hanging on a wall..... On falls down and the other ones name is Erwin

Why was Jimi's mom sad? Because Jimi suddenly fell to the floor clenching his neck while saying "I'm Dying!"

why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

what did the bus driver say to the black man when he got on the bus? nothing, carl has become very anti-social since his brother died

What do you call a woman with one leg? I don't know. I am not in the position, currently, of knowing anyone who finds themselves in such an unfortunate condition.

So an Alex Gedrose walks into a bar, and orders peanut butter and jelly toast on buttermilk with extra Linda on the side.

What is white, red, and all in your girlfriend? red and white blood cells

a man walks into a bar.... his? drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

What did the old women do when she found her husband dead? She had a heart attack and died as well.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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