why does the man appear fat he is

What's nappy,brown,intoxicated,and stealing my bike? A Blazed, black guy that stole my bike.

What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

Knock Knock.

Q: Why do Asian children tend to be smarter than other children A: They have longer school years

Q: What did the police officer tell the man without a shirt on? A: Put a shirt on.

time to spruce up!

SPILL THE BEAAAANNSSSS

A black man, a gay man, and an Asian woman are sitting at a bar. The black man gets a phone call, and after the call all three of them are excited because they are all friends and the black man just got into a good college.

What do you call a griraffe and a duck who's favorite colors are both purple? A coincidence in which two unrelated species have the same preference in colorant hues.

What's brown and sounds like a bell? An old rusted bell.

You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

Why did Sarah fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.... Knock, Knock, Who's there?: Not Sarah

Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your mum is dead, Just fucking with you! Kelvin Yang.

What is brown and smells bad? A white person that had been bathed in brown paint, and didn't shower for the next month, and rubbed poop all over them, and rubbed diarrhea all over them and rubbed rock poop all over them and rubbed pee all over them, and rubbed mud all over them, and pooped in a bottle.

A man walks into a bar, orders a drink, drinks it, and leaves.

Your momma is so dumb that her IQ is 3 standard deviations below that of an average person.

Jim: Kevin, how old are you? Kevin cries because they are twins. His Brother was hit in the head with a bat yesterday and does not remember anything.

Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? He tried to cross the road.

What did the alien say to the other alien? It's hard to say. They could use an inefficient form of aural analog communication, or a hyper-advanced form of telepathy. Either way, modern science hasn't brought us far enough to determine.

Scenario: Two guys are out hunting. Two guys are walking and a one falls down. The other calls 911 and the guy still standing asks what to do. The person at the hospital told him to make sure his friend was dead, then heard a gunshot. The guy who called said "Now what do I do?"

I can't stand being in a wheelchair.

How do you get McFly into a Mini? McFly are a four member band and a mini has four seats so it's actually quite straightforward.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...