A blind man walks into a bar. Nobody is surprised.

Today I wanted to make world peace.... So I killed everyone.

why did little johnny start choking? because somebody shoved a bag down his throat

What's similar between a black man and jelly babies? Nothing

Want to hear a joke? No.

Hey do you have a suitcase? Why? I need one.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? That is not nearly as important as how to cure cancer so let's not worry about it.

Your mums so tall, she's above the average height of women for her age.

What did the black kid get for Christmas? An X-box, a sweater and some socks.

time to spruce up!

Yo momma so fat shes eating right now

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What happened to Jillian when she walked out the door? She got hit by a bus A. Knock knock B. Whos there? A. Not Jillian

Why shouldn't you try to pick up a live scorpion with your teeth? Because it could easily sting your face, or mouth.

It's weird how two of the SAME jokes can get different ratings.

What did the customer say to the waiter when he found a fly in his soup? Sorry to bother you on your break, but why didn't I get a fly in MY soup?

What's black and white and red all over? A black, white, and red shirt.

What do you call an alligator in a circus? Testicular Cancer.

whats the difference between a baby and an onion? no one cries when u chop up a baby.

Who would win, Chuck Norris or a T-Rex? The T-Rex, Chuck Norris would get ripped apart like any other human-being.

ERROR 3045: This joke has gone bankrupt and Is laying in the hospital//:: THE CAUSE: OBAMA CARE

Why was King Triton mad at Ariel? Her grades were under the C.

A black man, Jew and a Mexican go camping. A bear wanders into their campsite, but upon seeing them runs away because it's afraid of humans.

What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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