Why did the woman make a sandwich? Because she was hungry.

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What do you call Jake Morter? Jake Morter

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A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

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Why did the muslim cross the road? To blow up a train

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What did the african get for his birthday? an ounce of water, as water is very scares in his community and it is a great resource

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An Jewish man worked at a bank, and ate chicken noodles for lunch and then stabbed and man playing the saxophone.

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What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table isn't a whore.

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what will you never loose if you play world of warcraft your verginity

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A group of blondes rent a car and decide to drive to Disney World. Along the highway, they see a sign reading "Disney World left." They exit the highway, turn left, and enjoy their well-deserved vacation from practicing law.

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Her doctor told her that if she didn't start watching her cholesterol she might suffer from heart related illness in the near future.

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oh, brown loaf is fine, i'm on my bike.

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What's scarier than a ghost? Practically anything as ghosts aren't real.

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What can kill you when it falls out of a tree? Anything of a considerable weight actually.

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what do a heater and a dead baby have in common? a dead baby is only warm for a small period of time

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Why did the boy have glass in his mouth? Because he was chewing on glass.

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What's red and shiny? Not the holocaust

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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Why did the... Timmy, your mother and I are both tired.

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Q. The farmer said where's my bucket A. Somewhere

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What's the difference between Rick Perry and a toaster? One is a republican presidential candidate, while the other is an electrical appliance.

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Women's Rights

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Whats funnier than a massacre? Everything.

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lets go to the beach beach lets go get away story of josh browns life

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When A White Man Sees A Magic Trick - He Claps When A Black Man Sees A Magic Trick - He Does Handstands, Celebrations, And Shouts

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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