What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A bike.

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Whats the difference between a horse and glue? Nothing

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Clause? Tiger Woods is a well-known golfer and Santa Clause is a mythical man who delivers presents to young children.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet You have pancreatic cancer

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Everytime God shuts a door, he opens a window... ...But I am the Goddamn locksmith!

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Why did the balck man sit at the back of the bus? Because all the other seats were taken.

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Boy it's sure cold out today. Die

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A group of young men walks into a bar. They drink some booze, laugh, have a great time and then go home to sleep.

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chinga tue madre Ryan

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What did Ed Gein get at McDonalds? The corpse of a worker he killed by the dumpster and hauled back to his shack to hang up and gut like a deer.

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What gets louder as it gets smaller? A man in a trash compactor.

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What did the day say to his son when he came out of the closet? Its alright

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Red my dear, we are no exceptions.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Your wife has been killed in a car accident.

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Hitler, Mussilini, And Hideki Tojo Walk In To A Bar Mitzvah, Everyone Was Brutally Murdered & No One Survived.

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Knock Knock.

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What do you call a fat guy running on the street? Nothing because you should respect his effort trying to improve his health.

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This is SPARTA! SPARTA? THIS IS MADNESS! (kicks guy down well) What is hurt! Baby dont love me, dont love me, no more. Moral: The funny thing is probably that the line makes a lot more sense all of sudden does it not?

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What do you get when you cross a stream with a prostitute? A wet hooker.

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What did one wall say to the other? Nothing. Walls can't talk.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? An obsession with what motivates a chicken.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Although this is a highly improbable scenario, one would assume that, being a chicken, it did not have much of an intuitive idea as to what to do while it was stray for whatever reason in an urbanized area. Considering chickens do not harbor nearly as much of a mental capacity as it would require to even comprehend the concept of a "road" and is impervious to the idea of oncoming traffic and such, the fact that it happened to be crossing the road was in fact not even recognized by the chicken. For this reasons I deem this question unanswerable.

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why did susy fall off the swing? Cause she has no arms knock knock Who's there? not susy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops