What did the Insomniac, Dyslexic Priest do? He stayed up all night wondering if there really is a Dog.

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What's oily and smells like smegma? Kevin Crummy

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your pear.

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I just wrote three jokes on antijoke.com ... nope, make that four.

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Is this the Krusty Crab? Yes.

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A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all entered their designated classrooms to begin AP testing. They all worked extraordinarily hard to earn a passing grade and receive college credit. The brunette and the redhead received passing, yet average, grades. The blond also received a score that reflected the amount of effort she put into studying and memorizing the material, because there is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

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What did the tree say to the plant. Nothing tree's cant talk.

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A little girl meets a homeless guy named Ian McDermott in downtown Atlanta She then screams stranger danger and a nearby policeman comes and arrests the man.

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what do you get when a white woman and black man have a child? either a girl or a boy

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What do you call a dog that has no legs? It doesn't matter because he will never come.

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How do you make a nerd cry? Give him a 99% on a test.

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whats white and black, and red all over, kiren poping jacob cherry

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Roses are red Violes are blue I am hot How bout you?

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What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

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Are you ready kids "Aye Aye Captain" I Can't hear you "AYE AYE CAPTAIN" Ohh... Who lives in a pineapple under the sea "Spongebob squarepants" Absorbant and yellow and porous is he "Spongebob Squarepants" If nautical nonsense be something you wish "Spongebob Squarepants" Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish "Spongebob Squarepants" READY Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!

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Two friends are arguing over who is the best pie maker. '' I've made pumpkin, apple, peach, cherry, blueberry, and sweet potato!" " Yeah well I've made all of those AND pecan!'' ''Yeah well have you ever made boysenberry pie?!" "No! What the hell!" *in a calm tone* " Yeah, me neither."

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what did the poor guy get for christmas POVERTY

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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How do you put a baby to sleep? Snap its neck.

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What do you call a black man with big cuts on his arms? You call an ambulance to help him!

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What do you call a black man that is wearing a suit? Whatever his name happens to be

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whats fat, green and hairy? Nothing I would pleasure myself to.

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What did the black boy wear for Halloween? A costume.

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Why did the fat guy survive the the plane crash? He was late to get up due to a malfunctioning alarm clock and so missed his flight, sparing him of the tragic outcome the other passengers suffered. To this day he still thinks about how a completely random occurrence saved his life.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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