what do you get when you cross a jellyfish, a jar, and a brown crayon? i dont know, im not into genetics, and jars dont have genes.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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Why the african children was sad? - Because an octopus bite his arm

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Gods like Santa one day you'll get to the age of reason and see how dumb you were

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Why couldn't the 13 year old get into the pirate movie? He has cancer and is dying in the hospitable.

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If you don`t see a banner here, it doesn`t mean it wont come back to annoy you whenever it feels like.... P.S, Advertising helps us get rich while permanently harming your ability to focus, Please be understanding! PS: Why the hell do they use capital letters after you know, Commas? its, Weird!

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Roses are red Violets are blue, Eat my anus with a spoon.

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Q: What do you call a pair of dead babies lying on the ground? A: Slippers

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What do u call a white hourse with no ass Penelope

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“When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don’t want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I’m gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!”

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whats worst then geting a used condom put in your mouth geting wraped by mario then lugi

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Stop making fun of Stevie Wonder, you dont seen what he has.

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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Drunk, a tweeker and a pot head are walking together when they come upon a huge wall with a large, locked gate in the middle of it. The drunk shouts "lesh shmash it down!" then passes out. The tweeker says "Dude, we should totally take the lock apart and see if there's some kind of mechanism in there holding it together that we can use to build some sort of machine for taking... oh man I gotta crap so bad! Either of you guys gota smoke?" and the pot head says "We should sit here and wait." I didn't say it was a good story

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What's more epic than a man in a gorilla suit? A man i a gorilla suit with a banana.

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What's orange and fluffy? Orange Fluff

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Did you know Hellen Keller had a tree house? Yeah..neither did she.

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What did the boy say after smoking weed for the first time? -"I don't really feel anything" and his friends explained that is sometimes the case for a first time smoker.

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A blonde takes a test. She scores higher than her Asian friend.

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Q:why did jimmy fall of a swing? A:Because someone threw a fridge at him

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Your mamma is so fat that she is undergoing strict diet and exercise in order to reduce the risk of premature death due to health complications.

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roses are red violets are blue show me your bed i wanna fuck you oh and roses are red violets are blue nice tits.

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Q: What happens if you pee on a rock and scraches it on a tree? A: The tree gets wet

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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