Why are Asians yellow? Because that is their natural skin color

Chuck Norris doesnt eat honey, hes allergic to it.

Why didn't the pregnant, pro-choice woman have an abortion? It was a planned pregnancy.

How many rats does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. But they have to be really small.

How do you keep a dummy in suspense for 24 hours? Tell him his wife suffered from a severe concussion and that he'll have to wait until morning to see if she's okay

What did the black guy do in the hood? walked down the street, bought the paper and watched Letterman.

Why couldn't the teenage pirate get into the movie? Because he lacked the required money for the ticket.

who would win in a gang battle? WEST COAST SWAG

There was once a boy named Aladin. He was very poor until he found a magic lamp. When he rubbed the lamp, a genie poped out of the lamp. He said... "I will grant you one wish, master" Aladin thought about this for a long time, until eventually he said... "I wish for all the chocolate in the world" "Very well, master" And the genie granted his wish and Aladin had all the chocolate in the world Unfortunately, because he ate so much chocolate, Aladin died of heart & liver failure

What do you do i a stranger offers you candy? Make sure its not stale then jump in his van.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in an open hole Poor body disposal practice

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Some poems have endings

There was a blonde, brunette and red head driving in a car. The car breaks down so the three of them decide to walk. So the red head takes water bottles, the brunette takes food and the blonde took the car. The red head asked the brunette why she was taking the food, the brunette said "incase i get hungry i can eat" then the brunette asked the red head why she brought water the red head said "incase i get thirsty i can have a drink. Then the brunette asked the blonde why she brought the car the blonde said "to drive home".

What did the waffle say when the black guy started eating him? Nothing, because waffles are inanimate objects and therefore cannot talk.

Who didnt visit the orphanage this year? Mom...

what did the man say to the person he hates? nothing!

What is red and cry's? A baby chewing on a razor blade

Scratch and Sniff [________] smells like glass doesn't it?

A Mexican walks into a bar. He walked out with a concussion. -ilikecrepes97

Q: What did the nazi say to hitler? A: You like my Auschwitz?

Why was the Saudi Arabian terrorist flying a plane in America? He was going to visit some family on a ranch in Kansas.

A rhinoceros walks into a bar. As it felt threatened by the presence of many humans, the rhino attacks and kills several people with the big horn on its nose.

Why couldn't the mexican make a taco? He died.

What more orange that a lime? Most things.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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