Whats green and has wheels? Grass...i lied about the wheels

It is so hot out here, that it could melt an ice cube that was once in the freezer!

Roses are red Violets are violet the last time i saw this poem i couldn't rhyme no more

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sunflowers are yellow, Daises are white.

An alcoholic walks into a bar. He wakes up the next morning in a jail cell covered in blood. 3rd time this week.

Knock, Knock Who's there? Knock, Knock Knock, Knock who? Knock, Knock

How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But all the replacements are high-tolerance, long-life and non-dimmable.

Two cows grazing by the road. One says hey what's all this about mad cows running around? I wonder what is it like? The other says I don't know I'm a helicopter.

Why did the babysitter only get paid 50 cents for a whole day. Because he was a 6 foot mexican.

What's funnier than my jokes? your face.

i am a dino. RAWR.

What do pancakes and Smokie Bear have in common? They both don't have aids

What did Tiger Woods do when he saw a woman taking her shirt off? He looked the other way so he could make his birdie putt

What's black, blue, and read all over? The newspaper.

Wanna hear a joke? Womens rights ;) Wanna hear another joke? Too bad i'm not gonna tell you

Why didn't the kid return home after school? He was having a sleep-over with a bunch of his friends. Who all died from a robbery.

Why did the girl go to Jupiter? To get more stupider

How Many Women Does It Take To Parallel Park A Car ? Zero , The Husband Drove

What would you do if Spider Man gave you super powers like his? Nothing. Spider Man is not real therefore you are most likely dreaming and need to wake up soon.

Teacher:What is the outer layer of a tree? Dog:Bark. Teacher: What is the square root of 69? Dog:8.30662386

Why is is afraid of seven? Because seven is a date rapist

Why did the chicken cross the road. grass was greener on the other side!

what happens when u fall down the stairs? you break your arm.

What's worse than the Holocaust? ........finding a worm in your apple.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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