How do you confuse a blond? Paint your self green and throw forks at her.

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Q. What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A. Cancer

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1 little monkey jumping on the bed, he fell off and hit his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, "Your son died of a concussion."

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Wanna hear a joke? Zeke friends Wanna hear a better jokes? Zeke with his friends

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Yo mama is so fat that her doctor advised her to get some exercise or risk developing a heart condition!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It escaped.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He didn't say anything because ducks can't talk.

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A guy punched himself. He then said ouch.

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One time there was a guy who jumped off a bridge and died

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Q: Why did the boy not laugh at the Anti Joke? A: Because he has no sense of humor

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. The Clouds are white. Thank God I am too.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have fetal alcohol syndrome."

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A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Barack Obama. Ok, come on in Mr. President!

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What was so sad about the white woman who dropped her Starbucks? It fell on her baby in a nearby stroller giving it third degree burns, disfiguring its face.

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What is white and weighs twice as much as Shamoo? My ass.

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks the duck "What'll it be?" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck and it can't talk.

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Knock Knock. You don't have a door.

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What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot

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so your paddling up stream in a cement canoe, one wheel falls off. how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 46 cause bears dont like eggs.

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What did the black man buy at the store? Nothing he has no money

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What do you call Anne Franks life? A big game of hide and go seek.

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Why did the monk shave his head? So he's more aerodynamic.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a brunette? One is blonde and one is brunette.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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