There once was a man from Peru, Who dreamed he was eating his shoe, When he woke up one night he discovered with fright, That the friendly old neighbor from next door had broken into his house with a chain saw in an alcohol-induced murder attempt.

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How do you blindfold an asian? step 1: Fold your blindfold into a triangle step 2: Wrap blindfold around the head of the asian step 3: Tie the blindfold on the back of the asians head step 5: You forgot 4 step 6: Your finished step 4: Tighten the blindfold Now you know how to blindfold an asian ˜´??

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I've just bought a chainsaw, and I will now decapitate you.

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Q- what's the difference between a trampoline and a baby? A- you take of your shoes to jump on a trampoline

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What do you call a over weight woman? Fat bitch.

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A nun walks into a bar. She is immediately excommunicated.

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What do you get when you cross a Minotaur with a snowman? A cold mythological creature.

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roses are red poo is poo

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Q: humpty dumpty sat on a wall A: yeah right

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What's green and hangs from trees? Leafs

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Q:why did the guy go to the doctor? A:I dunno, he must have gone for a good reason

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What's sad about 3 black people going over a cliff in a Cadillac? Cadillac's seat 6

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How many blacks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, unless he's short. Then, he'll need a friend to hold the ladder for him.

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I love this website, oh shit *Car* Dead*

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Hellen Keller went to town a ridin on a pony, stuck a feather in her hat and called it.. ashhlerthurbujahustar.

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irish man drinking john smiths

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Why did the magician die when he tried to escape from the handcuffs underwater? Because he drowned and failed his magic trick.

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"Hey ask me if i'm fat" "Are you fat" "Leave me alone"

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There once was a girl with only one buttcheek. She couldn't go poop. She died.

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An Englishman, a Welshman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are all stranded on a desert island. After several days spent utilizing the survival skills they had been taught in the Royal Navy, they were eventually evacuated by fellow sailors searching for them. As the only survivors, their stories were vital in preventing such shipwrecks in future.

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How many beavers does it take to paint a house blue? 0, beavers cant paint.

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Michael Brown

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupter. Interrupter who? Interrupter Jones.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops